Ep 43: THE CHRISTMAS SPECIAL: Secret Santa, Memorable Gifts & Why Turkey Is Massively Overrated

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Hey bro, welcome back to the
episode Ohh Teach, Sleep repeat.

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My name is Dylan.
My name is Mary Christmas A.

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Good one.
That's what your name mate like.

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We like it was.
Just so silly.

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My name's Hayden.
My name's Dylan and first of

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all, I can't believe the hats
are gone to my head.

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I'm very shocked.
We bought these hats for this

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episode.
People who don't watch Hayden,

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there are some people who don't
watch.

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They might have worked out from
what we said so far.

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So if you don't watch, we are
wearing warm.

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Hats.
What are we confused in my head?

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We confused at the hat might not
have fit round Hayden that the

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Santa hat.
This is a Christmas.

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Special Now I don't know about
you ohh I've not seen any other

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podcast.
Here Christmas.

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Special.
No, I've not.

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I I think we've coined the term
Christmas special.

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I think so.
I think we have first ever

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podcast and the first ever
podcast to do Christmas special.

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First ever podcast?
Yeah, OK.

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All these bloody people coming
out with bloody podcasts.

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Yeah, they like.
Bloody bloodies I.

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Guess what are they like?
Anyway, so thank you for joining

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us for this Christmas special
episode, Dylan.

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Should we start by talking about
our week?

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Yes, and anyone again who's
watching, if you're not

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watching.
I.

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Forgot, he said.
Look, I posted on our Instagram.

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I did say tell me it's the start
of the summer holidays while the

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school holidays rather not
summer yet.

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No.
Whoa, tell me it's the start of

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the school holidays without
telling me it's the start of the

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school holidays which is the
picture of my hand.

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Yeah, because those are
watching.

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Can tell those are one I've got
bandaged up hand because minor

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bird.
So the story was very briefly, I

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was cooking, the baby was crying
because the baby was hungry.

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You're taking the baby.
Yeah, the baby's baby was hungry

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and it was I was cooking in for
his dinner.

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So we I I got the food out the
oven, put it down and I was

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like, right, I'll go and sort
his ball out quickly.

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And I was halfway towards the
bottom.

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I thought, wait a minute, no, it
will take Me 2 seconds just to

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sort the food out.
Then it can start to cool off

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the rack, which I was like metal
racks are really hot when they

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come out the oven, so let's take
it off so we can call properly.

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So I'll do that.
I turn back around.

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I went to get the stuff out of
the oven and I just picked up to

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try that had been in the oven,
just literally picked up.

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So it was in my hand before I
realised, dropped everything

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through to the floor, was
running under the tap.

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My finger immediately came up
and this massive blister and I

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was like, I don't think that's.
Normal.

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And I had a burn on my palm
Burnham over 2 fingers right at

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the tip.
Small, tiny.

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They're better now, but they you
can see where they are, but

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they're absolutely fine anyway.
So I was like, I'm not going up

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to you need to get it seen
because it's your hand, and

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apparently it's your hand.
Then it's important to get it

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seen because you need your hand
staff, apparently.

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If it was my elbow, I reckon
that.

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Tell me two things.
You need a hand.

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For anything.
So I was like, OK, I'll, do you

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know what the, the compromise
was?

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We'll ring 111, OK.
Took about an hour to get

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through.
To one was my number, yeah.

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And they were like yeah go and
get it.

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Seen in the hospital was like Oh
my Anyway, went up there and

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they sent me round to urgent
treatment centre which is a

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different.
Thing How did you get there?

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Die.
I couldn't drive.

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How did he get there if?
He.

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I don't know who would help you.
I don't know.

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Time of need.
Like I don't know who would I

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ring first.
Well, my mum.

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Ohh yeah.
Was my mum.

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No, it was you.
Ohh.

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Thank you.
Hayden.

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He took me the two-minute drive.
It is very lucky that we live

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close to hospital.
Anyway, went to the urgent

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treatment centre and I was like,
it's Sunday night.

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It's gonna be so busy.
There's gonna be less staffing

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empty.
And I was seen immediately.

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So it was like one of the best
experiences I've ever had with

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the NHS.
And I was just like, oh and

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classic me getting annoyed
straight away.

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Like this should be like it all
the time.

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This is how it should be.
But anyway, I was really

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grateful.
My nurse was someone I went to

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primary school with, so that's
really cool.

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We're chatting, we're having a
having a little chin wag, And

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then I went back two days later
for a review and I was like,

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cool, gonna get all these off.
She was like, we need to do it

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for another five days.
Is that what?

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So five days takes us to New
Year's and Christmas Eve.

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Sorry.
And anyway, I've still got it

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on.
I took these two off because

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they got wet earlier when I was
having a bath and I thought, you

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know what, I'll risk it and
they're fine.

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Nice.
So that's that's my lovely

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boring story, bro.
Who in today's Christmas special

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I wanted to hear a.
Formative story about that Well,

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I tell you what.
If you listen to the last

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episode, you might remember the
hypothetical Dillon gave me

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about chopping off fingers for
certain amounts of money.

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How?
Much would that seriously OK.

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Yeah, it looks like Dylan.
Has the hypothetical video

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missed that bite size episode
was quite simply, you get 10

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grand for cutting one finger off
and a lot of people would say no

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to that, but then every
subsequent finger you cut off,

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it's 10 times more.
So be cut off 2 fingers, 100

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grand, three fingers.
Which is why I went for in the

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end, yeah, a million.
So I am waiting for that.

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Hayden Yeah, Well, we, the
conclusion we came to was all of

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them unhappy.
Unlimited wealth.

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And then we'll use some of that
money to just fund amazing

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bionic hands like you're rich
and you have better.

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Hands.
OK, so that's my that's been the

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highlight of my week.
All the low light.

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I don't know how you would Yeah.
Something low Life your life.

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Absolute lowlife scum.
You're not saying what?

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My week's boring, so I'm gonna
go straight to another

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hypothetical because I've not
done anything.

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Interesting watching those
retention girls.

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Can't How can I top a burnt
hand?

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How can I top a burnt hand?
So I've got a new hypothetical

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for you, OK?
Is it Christmas themed?

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Obviously it's Christmas theme.
OHF You know, watching Christmas

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still on Christmas Hats still
just about.

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In fact.
Dylan can't take it off, you

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know.
What I think in about two

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minutes the blood will have
stopped circulating in my brain.

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So if I start going crazy, it's
because this hat is.

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Gonna have to take you to any
again this guy.

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Minor head injury.
How to treat your that was it

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was it by the way guys, I got a
leaflet at the end of all that

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and it just said how to treat
your minor burn and minor was in

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quotes.
Pathetic.

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Anyway, so hypothetical.
So in this hypothetical, you get

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3 present choices.
OK, but you can only choose one

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of them.
Now the twist is the other two

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will never happen.
So there are three things that

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could happen, right?
You get to choose one.

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The other two will not ever
happen.

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So you've got to think.
Also, you're literally making

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that noise.
OK, All right.

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You've got to think.
The two I don't choose.

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How much burden that gonna be?
I've got it Ready.

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So here are your three
statements.

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One to choose from.
OK, you have enough glue sticks

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for your class.
Ohh, that would be lovely.

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That's option number one.
What?

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Always.
At all times?

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Yeah, just whenever you want
them.

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You.
You'll never be in a state where

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you don't have enough glue
sticks for your class.

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Alright, that's good.
Beautiful, right?

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Yeah.
That one.

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Present #2.
Hang on.

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Present number two.
Option #2.

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Every time you use the printer.
OK.

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It's free, it's working, and it
has paper in it.

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That is a.
Luxury.

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Ohh God, I've gotta pick one.
Yeah, that's just that's OK.

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You got one more option.
You guys play along at home.

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Have a think about which one you
pick.

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The last one.
Is this after school meetings?

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Yeah, permanently.
Cancelled.

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My gosh.
When the kids go home, once

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you've dropped off, there's
never ever a planned meeting

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afterwards.
So you just got to mark and go.

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You do, Yeah.
But you know, there's never the

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burden of OK, something after
school plan for you like.

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OK, I've got.
OK, I'm going to start my

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reasoning.
OK, so firstly, although it's

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amazing to not have meetings
after school, yeah, I I'm happy

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for those to continue because
although they're really annoying

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sometimes they're really useful.
And also it's not every day we

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ask.
We have one meeting a week after

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school.
Some weeks there might.

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Be two.
There's just a lot of schools.

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Have two, I know.
That, yeah.

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So I think I would say OK, I'll
sacrifice those meetings.

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So that's going to be something
that.

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Will always happen.
So if that's in your two that

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you're not choosing, that means
there are lots.

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There will always be after
school meetings.

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OK, cool.
So now you gotta pick between

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the printer and the glue sticks.
OK now.

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There's two trains of thought
here.

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Some people will be saying,
well, we didn't print anything

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anyway, everything's online, but
it's not.

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We're not in our school, so we
need these valuable, valuable

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printers.
I think personally, I would take

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the printer working all the
time.

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Really.
Yeah.

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Yeah.
Yeah.

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Because.
OK, let me tell you why.

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Because with the Pritt sticks,
OK, I've lived my entire teacher

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life never having enough.
OK, So that I'm used to that at

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least the printer sometimes is
available and works OK.

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I'd say about 50% of the time.
Whereas 99% of the time I don't

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have enough gold sticks anyway.
And we could just write straight

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in our book.
We don't need to stick anything

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in.
And if someone moans, I'll just

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be like, oh, I didn't have any.
So I'm going to go for the

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printer because there is nothing
more frustrating than coming in

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Monday.
You've got to print your stuff.

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Hayden's at the computer,
printing his entire week.

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There's nothing more annoying.
And then, and then he'll be just

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about finished and this little
notification will go, beep, boop

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boop.
There's a jam in the printer and

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he'll just walk.
Off.

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I'm done.
That don't need that printed

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00:08:37,240 --> 00:08:38,770
anyway.
You fixed the jam and you're

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like, brilliant.
Here we go.

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We're gonna press print out of
paper.

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OK, Go to the paper store.
No paper left.

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Yeah.
Be more annoying.

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I hate having to put paper in
the printer.

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I don't know what it is about
it.

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Sometimes it is literally right
there.

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You just have to pick it up, put
it in.

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00:08:53,110 --> 00:08:55,260
But I'm like ohh so the biggest
burden ever.

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It's annoying.
It's frustrating.

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I think your reasoning is pretty
good.

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Yeah, I agree with you.
Really.

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I agree.
I was torn between the two, but

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you're.
Are you ever gonna have your own

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00:09:03,220 --> 00:09:04,900
train?
Thought no, no, no.

232
00:09:04,910 --> 00:09:06,730
I rely on you.
Yeah, that's fine.

233
00:09:06,740 --> 00:09:07,940
That's fine by me.
You are my flame.

234
00:09:07,950 --> 00:09:09,980
But it would be cool if I read
and then you just had your own

235
00:09:09,990 --> 00:09:14,360
independent thoughts.
Judge safety with my mouth.

236
00:09:14,790 --> 00:09:15,610
No.
What was it?

237
00:09:15,620 --> 00:09:17,640
Was that mean?
It was about Josh after

238
00:09:17,650 --> 00:09:19,920
something.
It was just me that went round.

239
00:09:19,930 --> 00:09:21,940
And there was this woman just
going and it was just stuff.

240
00:09:21,950 --> 00:09:24,080
These music.
That was it.

241
00:09:24,090 --> 00:09:26,310
No, I didn't.
Talking to me was, Yeah.

242
00:09:26,320 --> 00:09:29,260
Yeah, made me laugh so much this
morning.

243
00:09:29,270 --> 00:09:31,250
He made a meme, another meme he
likes making his memes.

244
00:09:31,320 --> 00:09:33,890
So check out our Instagram.
And I made on this.

245
00:09:34,240 --> 00:09:38,230
I keep imagining you finding out
about your minor burn doing the

246
00:09:38,240 --> 00:09:40,250
scream.
No.

247
00:09:40,420 --> 00:09:43,070
What this mean?
What do you mean finding out?

248
00:09:43,080 --> 00:09:46,840
Like I didn't feel it.
Gonna leave it, says Minor Bird.

249
00:09:46,850 --> 00:09:49,170
And you're like, no.
Like your life changed forever.

250
00:09:50,910 --> 00:09:54,200
We're still on the main trade
basically, guys, so maybe I can

251
00:09:54,210 --> 00:09:56,870
make some Christmas memes
because we're in the Christmas

252
00:09:56,880 --> 00:09:58,280
good.
Now we're desperate for views.

253
00:09:58,330 --> 00:10:00,310
Yeah, desperate.
For views, I gotta say I'm gonna

254
00:10:00,320 --> 00:10:03,200
go after the tangent here we're.
Desperate for views I just

255
00:10:03,210 --> 00:10:07,020
didn't take that we're.
Begging Oh my God, we just need

256
00:10:07,030 --> 00:10:10,420
to churn out the content.
I want to talk about something

257
00:10:10,430 --> 00:10:12,780
because I saw real.
I think it was Mr P did a real

258
00:10:12,790 --> 00:10:15,500
about basically people online
commenting about teaching.

259
00:10:15,730 --> 00:10:18,400
And it's really interesting
because I think he's bang on as

260
00:10:18,410 --> 00:10:20,220
always.
And it was basically he was

261
00:10:20,230 --> 00:10:23,690
saying teaching must be the only
profession where people feel

262
00:10:23,700 --> 00:10:26,730
like they can tell us how easy
it is without having never done

263
00:10:26,740 --> 00:10:28,610
it before.
And it's so interesting because

264
00:10:28,620 --> 00:10:30,640
it's it's true.
And having posted these memes

265
00:10:30,650 --> 00:10:33,490
and running this account, now
obviously the algorithm spits it

266
00:10:33,500 --> 00:10:36,170
out to anyone.
Of course, the more you interact

267
00:10:36,180 --> 00:10:38,210
with teaching memes, the more
likely you are to be a teacher

268
00:10:38,220 --> 00:10:40,530
and therefore our audience is
more likely teachers, even when

269
00:10:40,540 --> 00:10:42,610
it's just the algorithm.
But there's obviously always

270
00:10:42,620 --> 00:10:44,770
gonna be those kind of people
who comment on the teaching

271
00:10:44,780 --> 00:10:48,270
memes going, don't you know how
lucky you are that your holidays

272
00:10:48,280 --> 00:10:51,610
and it's so easy because once
they've done that coming once it

273
00:10:51,620 --> 00:10:53,930
sounds like, ohh, I'm gonna give
them the rest of them, they'll

274
00:10:53,940 --> 00:10:55,620
keep commenting and that's good
for Instagram.

275
00:10:55,690 --> 00:10:58,350
I guess, I mean, I don't know.
Whenever I go to the doctors,

276
00:10:58,360 --> 00:11:00,340
I'd like to tell them that I
could tell them exactly what

277
00:11:00,350 --> 00:11:04,290
they told me on Google.
Excuse me, I know I came here to

278
00:11:04,300 --> 00:11:06,590
test you.
I read Google, thank you and I

279
00:11:06,600 --> 00:11:08,910
know I've got a brain problem.
Thank you very much.

280
00:11:08,920 --> 00:11:10,510
I've read it.
On no, sorry, you just got a

281
00:11:10,520 --> 00:11:12,050
headache.
No, no, no, no, no this.

282
00:11:12,060 --> 00:11:15,700
I need a CT scan right now
because Google said on the Quora

283
00:11:15,710 --> 00:11:18,950
digest page of the algorithm I
got.

284
00:11:19,320 --> 00:11:22,330
It told me I've got a problem
that needs saying imagine that.

285
00:11:22,340 --> 00:11:23,760
Must be the bane of doctors
though.

286
00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:25,370
Anyway, the point it got me
thinking.

287
00:11:25,380 --> 00:11:29,610
We have this bloke on one of our
memes, right, who commented Ohh,

288
00:11:29,620 --> 00:11:31,220
right.
Basically saying I know exactly

289
00:11:31,230 --> 00:11:32,800
what you're saying.
I read it and do you know, do

290
00:11:32,810 --> 00:11:34,220
you know how you know?
Then it's a trial.

291
00:11:34,270 --> 00:11:35,480
Do you know how you know when
it's a trial?

292
00:11:35,490 --> 00:11:36,750
No.
One, it's their names not in

293
00:11:36,760 --> 00:11:38,760
their account.
And two, their profile picture

294
00:11:38,770 --> 00:11:40,700
is of a car.
Yeah, that's how you know.

295
00:11:40,710 --> 00:11:43,590
Hang on.
Ohh yeah to me what did I

296
00:11:43,600 --> 00:11:45,840
comment?
That's how you know it's just

297
00:11:45,850 --> 00:11:48,490
the picture of a car and this
clearly middle-aged bloke going.

298
00:11:49,000 --> 00:11:51,820
You should try working with
adults in the service industry

299
00:11:51,830 --> 00:11:54,100
industry 10 times as hard as
teaching.

300
00:11:54,110 --> 00:11:56,240
All you do is moan.
I get more trigger than you

301
00:11:56,250 --> 00:11:57,070
though.
I'm glad you OK.

302
00:11:57,080 --> 00:11:58,610
I saw.
I read that through and I saw

303
00:11:58,620 --> 00:12:00,350
that you replied because I was
already.

304
00:12:00,360 --> 00:12:02,700
I was like, you know what I was
like that mean like.

305
00:12:03,470 --> 00:12:05,830
Did you see my reply that yeah,
because his his comment got

306
00:12:05,840 --> 00:12:08,420
about 12 likes clearly that his
algorithm lovers.

307
00:12:08,560 --> 00:12:11,260
And then my comment was quite
simply, three laughing emojis.

308
00:12:11,270 --> 00:12:13,780
And OK, I loved.
It.

309
00:12:14,000 --> 00:12:15,870
And you know.
Actually, no one carried on and.

310
00:12:15,880 --> 00:12:18,520
People involved, people would
comment obviously, because you

311
00:12:18,530 --> 00:12:20,520
get your back up and I get it,
but they were like really

312
00:12:20,530 --> 00:12:21,950
vanilla comments, not even
having a go.

313
00:12:22,010 --> 00:12:25,020
But he would reply like a 22
paragraph long reply, Yeah,

314
00:12:25,030 --> 00:12:27,140
about how he worked in the
service industry and it was so

315
00:12:27,150 --> 00:12:28,920
tricky and you should try
working with adults.

316
00:12:28,930 --> 00:12:30,750
Kids are easy to work with.
I'm like, what do you think?

317
00:12:30,760 --> 00:12:32,960
What do you think we do?
Your I work with you.

318
00:12:32,970 --> 00:12:34,440
Yeah.
You're an adult man.

319
00:12:34,450 --> 00:12:36,070
Like what?
They're What are you on about I?

320
00:12:36,080 --> 00:12:38,010
Did think it was an odd comment.
To make, I thought it was really

321
00:12:38,020 --> 00:12:39,850
funny because he said, have you
ever worked in the service

322
00:12:39,860 --> 00:12:41,470
industry?
And I was like, yeah, yeah,

323
00:12:41,480 --> 00:12:43,740
yeah, for six years before I
became a teacher and then I've

324
00:12:43,750 --> 00:12:45,560
been a teacher for seven years.
Have you ever worked in

325
00:12:45,570 --> 00:12:47,090
education because you seem to
talk like?

326
00:12:47,100 --> 00:12:48,070
You.
Did you not see what he did

327
00:12:48,080 --> 00:12:49,880
after that though?
No, I because I I noticed you

328
00:12:49,890 --> 00:12:51,640
stopped replying.
This is like I read this maybe

329
00:12:51,650 --> 00:12:52,870
like a few weeks after it
happened.

330
00:12:52,880 --> 00:12:55,270
Yeah, By the end of that thread
he says he is a teacher.

331
00:12:55,390 --> 00:12:57,720
No, he swear to God.
I swear to God.

332
00:12:57,820 --> 00:12:59,620
At the end of the he says yeah,
I am a teacher.

333
00:12:59,630 --> 00:13:01,540
Yeah, just lying.
These people just make it up.

334
00:13:01,550 --> 00:13:04,500
Just like he's arguments
completely ruined and he's like,

335
00:13:04,610 --> 00:13:07,240
yeah.
Yeah, easy.

336
00:13:07,300 --> 00:13:08,490
I do.
Yeah.

337
00:13:08,500 --> 00:13:10,220
You know that you work with
adults and wouldn't you?

338
00:13:10,260 --> 00:13:11,860
Yeah, you know that that.
Happened.

339
00:13:11,870 --> 00:13:14,090
You know, where do you think the
children come from?

340
00:13:14,560 --> 00:13:16,950
Yeah, just dropped off by the
stalks every day.

341
00:13:17,160 --> 00:13:18,650
Do you know there's more than
one class?

342
00:13:18,660 --> 00:13:21,030
Then you're not the only adult
teacher.

343
00:13:21,520 --> 00:13:24,050
Unbelievable.
But yeah, he's just the overall

344
00:13:24,060 --> 00:13:26,910
point I thought was so correct.
Imagine someone telling you how

345
00:13:26,920 --> 00:13:29,910
easy your job is.
Like do you don't know anything?

346
00:13:29,920 --> 00:13:31,830
I want your comments was like,
yeah it's not a race to the

347
00:13:31,840 --> 00:13:33,650
bottom mate.
Yeah basically your job can be

348
00:13:33,660 --> 00:13:34,730
hard as well.
Yeah.

349
00:13:34,740 --> 00:13:36,470
But we we can both just have
hard jobs.

350
00:13:36,480 --> 00:13:39,820
Like complaining about your job
being hard doesn't mean you're

351
00:13:39,910 --> 00:13:41,970
actually saying ohh and it's
harder than everyone else is

352
00:13:41,980 --> 00:13:45,610
watching this, isn't it?
Yeah, but it is.

353
00:13:45,940 --> 00:13:47,830
Well, this is all the all the
empirical data.

354
00:13:47,840 --> 00:13:50,930
And it's like, do they think
that teachers also just happen

355
00:13:50,940 --> 00:13:53,250
to be the weakest people ever?
That's what they're saying.

356
00:13:53,260 --> 00:13:54,630
Basically, they are.
Is there anyone else?

357
00:13:54,640 --> 00:13:56,470
Anyone else?
All everyone else's jobs?

358
00:13:56,480 --> 00:13:57,650
Really.
Why do you keep moaning?

359
00:13:59,370 --> 00:14:02,340
We just felt teachers who went
part time, we couldn't hack.

360
00:14:02,350 --> 00:14:04,050
It losing 1% of our muscle every
year.

361
00:14:04,060 --> 00:14:06,120
Look at us.
Ohh, that's not caught back.

362
00:14:06,330 --> 00:14:09,110
I can't think about it.
We have the teachers PT on one

363
00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:11,920
of our last episodes and he told
us yeah, that you lose if you

364
00:14:11,930 --> 00:14:13,640
don't do anything about your
fitness.

365
00:14:13,850 --> 00:14:15,880
You lose 1% of your muscle mass
every year.

366
00:14:16,170 --> 00:14:17,730
And I can't stop thinking.
About when you're 30.

367
00:14:17,770 --> 00:14:19,340
From your 30.
Oh, that's good.

368
00:14:19,410 --> 00:14:22,040
I'm only 1% down then.
All right.

369
00:14:22,230 --> 00:14:23,720
So I was thinking, Christ, I
stopped.

370
00:14:23,730 --> 00:14:25,630
I stopped moving when I was
about 23.

371
00:14:27,060 --> 00:14:28,550
Yeah, there we are.
Safe years, right?

372
00:14:28,600 --> 00:14:31,130
You gotta do something.
Now that's alright then.

373
00:14:31,400 --> 00:14:33,250
Back on the chocolate train for
me, baby.

374
00:14:33,720 --> 00:14:35,830
Right.
I've heard that our new producer

375
00:14:35,840 --> 00:14:39,270
of the podcast hashtag your
Lauren, and we say you're Lara.

376
00:14:39,280 --> 00:14:42,930
Not because we're possessive,
really think because you're

377
00:14:42,940 --> 00:14:44,470
Lauren.
Yes, set up.

378
00:14:44,480 --> 00:14:47,290
She has a little Christmas game
and we want you guys to play

379
00:14:47,300 --> 00:14:48,890
along at home.
I've not seen this.

380
00:14:48,960 --> 00:14:51,600
All I know is that this is one
of those, this or that game.

381
00:14:51,610 --> 00:14:53,970
She is, and she's written it.
I've got it here on my phone.

382
00:14:54,180 --> 00:14:56,490
So it's this or that.
You literally, you have to be

383
00:14:56,500 --> 00:14:58,820
quick, quick fire.
There's quite a few of them, OK.

384
00:14:59,010 --> 00:15:01,900
If anything's like hard, we go
into a conversation about it.

385
00:15:01,910 --> 00:15:03,560
Or would we have to be quick?
Sure we can.

386
00:15:03,570 --> 00:15:04,880
Let's do that.
We'll have a little conversation

387
00:15:04,890 --> 00:15:07,280
if you need to, but every single
one, All right.

388
00:15:07,290 --> 00:15:10,100
So play along at home.
Just say the one that comes to

389
00:15:10,110 --> 00:15:10,950
mind.
Christmas, Christmas.

390
00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:13,220
No ones listening with their
families.

391
00:15:13,270 --> 00:15:17,080
OK, listen in 2024 when you've
checked this episode on Let's

392
00:15:17,090 --> 00:15:22,780
play Chris Mercer, this or that.
The Christmas this or that.

393
00:15:22,820 --> 00:15:24,670
Ohh, glad you did that.
You don't have any jingles and I

394
00:15:24,680 --> 00:15:26,550
can't be bothered to get one in.
So ready.

395
00:15:27,280 --> 00:15:30,030
You get 2 seconds per one.
OK, real tree or artificial

396
00:15:30,040 --> 00:15:31,210
tree?
Real tree.

397
00:15:31,540 --> 00:15:33,870
I know we've got an artificial
tree, but I think a real tree is

398
00:15:33,880 --> 00:15:34,870
better.
Excellent.

399
00:15:34,940 --> 00:15:36,730
Decorate the tree or wrapping
presents.

400
00:15:36,940 --> 00:15:38,990
Decorate the tree.
Wrapping presents is horrendous.

401
00:15:39,080 --> 00:15:41,130
Just ignore your other half when
they tell you that you're doing

402
00:15:41,140 --> 00:15:44,560
a bad job.
Yes, yes, it sucks.

403
00:15:44,570 --> 00:15:46,260
I agree.
Christmas dinner or Christmas

404
00:15:46,270 --> 00:15:48,990
leftovers?
Ohh, Christmas dinner, 100%

405
00:15:49,000 --> 00:15:50,880
Christmas leftovers.
Just a bonus Christmas dinner

406
00:15:50,890 --> 00:15:52,910
Elite, alright?
Christmas jumpers or Christmas

407
00:15:52,920 --> 00:15:56,460
PJ's?
Christmas PJS from this year

408
00:15:56,530 --> 00:15:58,790
because we have matching ones
with Rory and I'm a convert, I

409
00:15:58,800 --> 00:15:59,620
think it will.
Really.

410
00:15:59,630 --> 00:16:03,820
And we got a really nice picture
of our babies, those cats,

411
00:16:04,150 --> 00:16:06,820
Christmas socks or slippers.
Socks.

412
00:16:06,890 --> 00:16:09,380
I don't really like slippers.
I wear Crocs around the house.

413
00:16:10,800 --> 00:16:15,150
Really embracing the dad life?
Early morning presents or all

414
00:16:15,160 --> 00:16:16,450
day slow present?
Opening.

415
00:16:16,460 --> 00:16:17,330
Oh, no, no, no, no.
No.

416
00:16:17,340 --> 00:16:17,790
No.
No, No.

417
00:16:17,800 --> 00:16:20,130
No, No, No, No, No, no, no,
sorry.

418
00:16:20,140 --> 00:16:22,220
Early morning.
The idea of slowly up the

419
00:16:22,230 --> 00:16:25,130
present throughout the day makes
me want to just call into a hole

420
00:16:25,140 --> 00:16:26,790
and never.
And by the way, very quickly on

421
00:16:26,800 --> 00:16:28,070
that.
I don't know if this is coming

422
00:16:28,080 --> 00:16:30,760
up, but I'm going to say right
now the type of people who you

423
00:16:30,770 --> 00:16:32,830
have to watch one at a time.
Yeah.

424
00:16:32,840 --> 00:16:34,590
No, it's not going up, but yeah.
No, no, no.

425
00:16:34,600 --> 00:16:36,250
Horrendous.
Yeah, I know the worst thing

426
00:16:36,260 --> 00:16:37,330
ever.
I agree.

427
00:16:37,340 --> 00:16:42,320
I'm into that next one.
Take turn opening gifts or open

428
00:16:42,330 --> 00:16:43,920
all at once.
I knew it was there.

429
00:16:43,930 --> 00:16:45,440
I was looking for.
I was gonna find this.

430
00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:48,300
OK, so my point on this is I
hate being watched.

431
00:16:48,410 --> 00:16:51,080
I hate it because if I don't
like it, I gotta pretend.

432
00:16:51,350 --> 00:16:53,040
No, let me hide.
Let me squirrel away all my

433
00:16:53,050 --> 00:16:54,160
gifts.
Thank you.

434
00:16:54,170 --> 00:16:57,480
Thank you, Avocado.
It's the first time I've got a

435
00:16:57,490 --> 00:16:58,260
Where's Wally?
Book.

436
00:16:58,270 --> 00:16:59,720
Thank you.
It was my mum.

437
00:16:59,730 --> 00:17:01,240
My mum found out I liked Where's
Wally?

438
00:17:01,250 --> 00:17:02,700
Once and and Guinness Book of
Record.

439
00:17:02,710 --> 00:17:04,960
So every single year, forever,
I've got a Where's Wally Book.

440
00:17:05,050 --> 00:17:06,980
And there was one year.
Thank you, Mum.

441
00:17:07,109 --> 00:17:09,599
When you got me, what you
thought was a Where's Wally

442
00:17:09,609 --> 00:17:10,720
Book.
But it was actually just a

443
00:17:10,730 --> 00:17:12,810
Where's Wally Annual.
And it was just facts about

444
00:17:12,819 --> 00:17:14,780
Where's Wally?
You know what?

445
00:17:14,829 --> 00:17:17,540
It wasn't even a Where's Wally
Pages such apparent.

446
00:17:17,550 --> 00:17:22,150
What's worse, I was 24 annual
awards.

447
00:17:22,550 --> 00:17:24,200
Annual 24.
Yeah.

448
00:17:24,589 --> 00:17:27,220
Ohh mate, I was teaching.
I've got one of the same, same

449
00:17:27,230 --> 00:17:29,280
as this, right?
It's so pathetic, right?

450
00:17:29,290 --> 00:17:32,830
So at one point when I was like
12, yeah, I decided that my

451
00:17:32,840 --> 00:17:35,720
window was looking quite boring
and I wanted an ornament and my

452
00:17:35,730 --> 00:17:37,460
mum was someone who had a
hedgehog ornament.

453
00:17:37,470 --> 00:17:40,770
I like that, I want that and my
mum took great interest in the

454
00:17:40,780 --> 00:17:43,180
fact that I cared about anything
in in the house.

455
00:17:43,190 --> 00:17:45,150
Normally I just don't care.
The TV is fine.

456
00:17:45,460 --> 00:17:48,890
And from then I just got, I got
like 12 hedgehog ornaments to go

457
00:17:48,900 --> 00:17:50,810
and I absolutely didn't like
them at any.

458
00:17:50,820 --> 00:17:52,670
Point is that me?
When your mum finds out you're

459
00:17:52,680 --> 00:17:54,930
like a certain food and the next
day you open, it just falls out.

460
00:17:54,940 --> 00:17:56,770
Oranges.
He just happened to say that

461
00:17:56,780 --> 00:17:57,880
orange was all right.
Well.

462
00:17:57,890 --> 00:18:00,410
Yeah.
Anyway, back to the game.

463
00:18:00,420 --> 00:18:01,630
So where was I?
Let me find it?

464
00:18:02,360 --> 00:18:03,710
Playing games or watching
movies?

465
00:18:03,980 --> 00:18:05,530
Playing games, you know, I'm a
game.

466
00:18:05,540 --> 00:18:07,790
I love a board game.
You are you are a gay man.

467
00:18:09,110 --> 00:18:14,050
I have my game.
Take turn opening gifts or I

468
00:18:14,060 --> 00:18:18,780
know we done that one table.
Look at you, I've got read table

469
00:18:18,790 --> 00:18:22,740
seating plan or sit wherever.
Ohh sit wherever but seating

470
00:18:22,750 --> 00:18:26,220
plan if I'm in control, If I'm
not in control no, no, no, no,

471
00:18:26,230 --> 00:18:29,590
don't tell me where to sit.
Rethought Garland Reef.

472
00:18:29,640 --> 00:18:31,580
Yeah, Lauren did that to me.
And I was.

473
00:18:31,590 --> 00:18:32,850
Gonna pretend I know what they
are.

474
00:18:34,750 --> 00:18:37,940
Cool.
Isn't Garland and old actress

475
00:18:38,910 --> 00:18:42,410
Judy Garland.
No, no, not her, no Whether got

476
00:18:42,850 --> 00:18:44,000
like the circular.
Things.

477
00:18:44,010 --> 00:18:46,200
Yeah, I know.
The ones that like lay across.

478
00:18:47,760 --> 00:18:51,250
If God's crap just to stick on
your legend, you know?

479
00:18:51,260 --> 00:18:53,870
Like leaves on it?
Yeah, I'd rather have a circular

480
00:18:53,880 --> 00:18:56,410
stick with some leaves.
Thank you very much.

481
00:18:56,720 --> 00:18:59,620
Paper chains or paper stars?
Ohh neither.

482
00:19:01,180 --> 00:19:02,960
OK, skip fairy lights or
candles.

483
00:19:03,640 --> 00:19:08,330
Fairy lights, yeah, candles.
Candles can be to aromatically

484
00:19:08,340 --> 00:19:10,720
stimulating.
Fair enough, fair enough.

485
00:19:10,840 --> 00:19:13,210
Traditional Christmas colour or
alternate colours.

486
00:19:13,380 --> 00:19:17,450
All traditional traditional
Angel Topper or star top style.

487
00:19:17,460 --> 00:19:20,550
We've got a star Angel.
Too many connotations there.

488
00:19:20,560 --> 00:19:23,430
Yeah, it's a bit weird, isn't?
It ice skating or Christmas

489
00:19:23,440 --> 00:19:24,880
markets.
Christmas markets.

490
00:19:24,890 --> 00:19:27,230
You see me, I've got half a
knee.

491
00:19:27,570 --> 00:19:29,660
An ice skating is just, it's
cold.

492
00:19:29,760 --> 00:19:32,230
I can't do it.
Why do we all pretend that

493
00:19:32,240 --> 00:19:35,170
that's fun and romantic?
Because we just look like Bambi

494
00:19:35,180 --> 00:19:36,200
on ice.
It's just not.

495
00:19:36,270 --> 00:19:38,620
And my mum told me that when I
was really young, when I asked

496
00:19:38,630 --> 00:19:40,520
for the first time, she said if
you fall over don't put your

497
00:19:40,530 --> 00:19:42,170
fingers out.
Because when I was a kid staying

498
00:19:42,180 --> 00:19:44,320
she said I saw someone have
their fingers chopped off by

499
00:19:44,330 --> 00:19:46,070
someone else.
Why is everyone's mum saying I

500
00:19:46,080 --> 00:19:48,110
don't know, but they're also
just scarred me.

501
00:19:48,120 --> 00:19:50,350
So not only could I not escape,
I didn't try and skate because

502
00:19:50,360 --> 00:19:51,650
I'm gonna fall over.
I thought over.

503
00:19:51,660 --> 00:19:53,540
I'll get my hands kicked off.
And I was like walking around

504
00:19:53,550 --> 00:19:56,810
like this, this bandaging.
I was honestly skating with my

505
00:19:56,820 --> 00:19:57,550
fist class.
Yeah.

506
00:19:57,560 --> 00:19:59,000
If I fell over I was standing
inside.

507
00:19:59,010 --> 00:20:01,910
I was like, I'll I'll land head
first, just keep my hand so I

508
00:20:01,920 --> 00:20:03,160
can.
Slice my head open but don't get

509
00:20:03,170 --> 00:20:05,110
my fingers.
Ohh man right?

510
00:20:05,340 --> 00:20:07,230
Build a snowman or snowball
fights.

511
00:20:07,760 --> 00:20:09,700
Snowball fights more
competitive?

512
00:20:09,710 --> 00:20:12,020
Yeah, that fundamental winter.
Stroll in the woods or village

513
00:20:12,030 --> 00:20:15,890
walk to see the lights.
I'm not bothered about the

514
00:20:15,900 --> 00:20:17,660
lights, so I like a stroll in
the woods, but it's.

515
00:20:17,670 --> 00:20:19,350
Nice and winter.
Yes, lovely.

516
00:20:19,360 --> 00:20:21,490
You where you want stuff.
Very nice Christmas food

517
00:20:21,500 --> 00:20:25,130
shopping or gift shopping.
Ohh, gift shopping.

518
00:20:25,770 --> 00:20:28,200
Because I hate being in Tesco or
Asda when it's busy.

519
00:20:28,210 --> 00:20:30,480
Yeah, horrendous.
Yeah ohh yeah this horrendous.

520
00:20:30,490 --> 00:20:32,080
But then also same for gift
shop.

521
00:20:32,090 --> 00:20:36,770
Yeah that's true.
Buy online, up online, or in

522
00:20:36,780 --> 00:20:38,290
person.
Definitely online.

523
00:20:38,300 --> 00:20:39,450
I'd rather sit there and do it
online.

524
00:20:39,460 --> 00:20:41,230
Agreed.
Gift cards or physical gift?

525
00:20:41,300 --> 00:20:44,380
Physical gift gift cards.
I honestly, anyone who's giving

526
00:20:44,390 --> 00:20:47,050
me a gift card in the past,
there's a 25% chance I used it

527
00:20:47,820 --> 00:20:49,100
because I just forget about
them.

528
00:20:49,110 --> 00:20:51,800
They just they.
Sit in your wallet Christmas Eve

529
00:20:51,810 --> 00:20:56,340
or Boxing Day.
Ohh, Christmas Eve, OK?

530
00:20:56,350 --> 00:20:58,340
I like Christmas.
Eve, Christmas Eve at the pub or

531
00:20:58,350 --> 00:21:01,680
at home?
Here's the thing, Chris.

532
00:21:01,690 --> 00:21:03,680
Right.
So we used to do Christmas Day

533
00:21:03,690 --> 00:21:05,220
Eve, if that makes any sense to
you.

534
00:21:05,230 --> 00:21:06,660
Yeah.
So Christmas Eve during the day,

535
00:21:06,670 --> 00:21:08,090
Yeah.
We'd all used to go to the pub

536
00:21:08,100 --> 00:21:09,380
before.
We had all our children stuff,

537
00:21:09,390 --> 00:21:10,390
all our mates.
And that was.

538
00:21:10,400 --> 00:21:13,020
I loved that tradition.
But I wouldn't want to be in the

539
00:21:13,030 --> 00:21:15,700
pub past like four or five,
because I like Christmas Eve Eve

540
00:21:15,710 --> 00:21:16,460
at home.
Yeah.

541
00:21:16,470 --> 00:21:18,500
So I'd say both to that one.
Yeah, Christmas Eve day, not

542
00:21:18,510 --> 00:21:19,590
Christmas.
Day Christmas.

543
00:21:20,510 --> 00:21:23,400
Yep.
OK, next one.

544
00:21:23,830 --> 00:21:25,760
Christmas with just your
household or Christmas with

545
00:21:25,770 --> 00:21:28,540
others, too?
I'd like Christmas of others.

546
00:21:28,550 --> 00:21:31,540
I'd like to spread out as much
because although Christmas

547
00:21:31,550 --> 00:21:34,330
family is nice, I also did
choose my friends, so I quite

548
00:21:34,340 --> 00:21:36,060
liked them, so I would like to
spend time with them.

549
00:21:36,070 --> 00:21:37,430
As a friend?
OK, what if it was just family

550
00:21:37,440 --> 00:21:38,390
though?
So it's either Christmas with

551
00:21:38,400 --> 00:21:41,290
your household, as in literally
just you and like the two people

552
00:21:41,300 --> 00:21:45,130
that live with you, or Christmas
with those same people and and a

553
00:21:45,140 --> 00:21:47,870
few family members as.
Well, family, yeah.

554
00:21:47,880 --> 00:21:49,500
Well, good game for you later
on, OK?

555
00:21:49,510 --> 00:21:53,350
You're like, OK, play the family
Christmas.

556
00:21:53,360 --> 00:21:55,120
It's gonna.
Be It's gonna be like there's

557
00:21:55,130 --> 00:21:57,900
always going to be, you know, as
people with huge families, it's

558
00:21:57,910 --> 00:22:00,280
always gonna be more tricky.
But we've got relatively small

559
00:22:00,290 --> 00:22:02,230
family and we always look
forward to it being nice.

560
00:22:02,240 --> 00:22:04,220
Yeah, this is a massive list, by
the way.

561
00:22:04,230 --> 00:22:07,150
We're about halfway through.
OK, well guys good job you.

562
00:22:07,160 --> 00:22:09,520
I hope you like this.
Really rapid fire.

563
00:22:09,730 --> 00:22:12,070
No explanations unless it's
really important, right?

564
00:22:12,080 --> 00:22:14,560
Decorations down sometime in
January or before the new year.

565
00:22:14,610 --> 00:22:17,500
January.
Get up early or lay in lay in

566
00:22:17,890 --> 00:22:19,840
mince pies or shortbread.
Shortbread.

567
00:22:19,850 --> 00:22:20,950
Hate mince pies?
Terrible.

568
00:22:20,960 --> 00:22:22,540
Most overrated thing about
Christmas Ever.

569
00:22:22,590 --> 00:22:24,490
Alright then.
Shortbread or your log?

570
00:22:24,750 --> 00:22:25,750
Shortbread.
Shortbread banging.

571
00:22:25,820 --> 00:22:27,910
It's like buttery goodness.
You look though like.

572
00:22:28,260 --> 00:22:30,610
Yeah, you're looking me dry.
Very rare shortbread.

573
00:22:30,620 --> 00:22:32,930
Bad pudding all round, two of
mains.

574
00:22:33,180 --> 00:22:35,290
Round two of mains, then we'll
always put in after.

575
00:22:35,300 --> 00:22:38,330
Anyway, selection box or
Christmas tree chocolates?

576
00:22:38,620 --> 00:22:40,590
Selection box Christmas tree
chocolates are annoying.

577
00:22:40,600 --> 00:22:42,670
Why should I have to?
Why should I have to, like, put

578
00:22:42,680 --> 00:22:45,030
effort in to get my chocolate in
the box in front of me?

579
00:22:45,380 --> 00:22:50,390
Brilliant Great gingerbread
house or bake Christmas cookies.

580
00:22:50,450 --> 00:22:53,470
Bake Christmas cookies because
ginger bread is disgusting.

581
00:22:53,480 --> 00:22:57,830
Nice roasted ham, roasted ham,
gammon, or roasted Turkey.

582
00:22:58,060 --> 00:22:59,300
Oh my God.
Roasted ham gammon.

583
00:22:59,310 --> 00:23:03,170
And I'm gonna stop you because I
need to do this quick.

584
00:23:03,210 --> 00:23:05,600
I've gotta put this public.
And let's talk about.

585
00:23:06,640 --> 00:23:09,810
It winds me up at Christmas when
you're saying, what are we

586
00:23:09,820 --> 00:23:14,150
having some Turkey?
It's like you don't even like

587
00:23:14,160 --> 00:23:17,030
Turkey.
No, I think less than 10% of the

588
00:23:17,040 --> 00:23:19,710
population like Turkey.
And then, well, it's Christmas.

589
00:23:19,720 --> 00:23:21,310
We've got to have Turkey.
No, we don't.

590
00:23:21,380 --> 00:23:23,190
No, no, you don't.
You're an adult.

591
00:23:23,260 --> 00:23:25,810
You can have whatever you want
because you're in control of it.

592
00:23:25,860 --> 00:23:28,330
So why don't you have some nice
meat instead of some horrible

593
00:23:28,340 --> 00:23:30,850
joint Turkey?
Turkey is just a crap version of

594
00:23:30,860 --> 00:23:32,850
chicken and chicken.
Bland anyway.

595
00:23:32,860 --> 00:23:35,360
This have some beef or lamb or
something or some gammon.

596
00:23:35,370 --> 00:23:37,940
That's that's good quality.
And if you're vegetarian, even

597
00:23:37,950 --> 00:23:39,140
better.
Could not be wasting the

598
00:23:39,150 --> 00:23:40,610
turkeys.
Can you just please vote in the

599
00:23:40,620 --> 00:23:43,330
poll of this episode, if you're
listening in the week that came

600
00:23:43,340 --> 00:23:45,680
out?
If you like that, you're not.

601
00:23:45,750 --> 00:23:47,390
Yeah, yeah, I agree.
By the way, Turkey is like, do

602
00:23:47,400 --> 00:23:49,760
you want some chicken or do you
want some dry horrible chicken?

603
00:23:50,970 --> 00:23:53,000
With a slight tangy 2.
Is it Christmas?

604
00:23:53,010 --> 00:23:54,240
Yeah.
Ohh can I have to try Horrible

605
00:23:54,250 --> 00:23:57,270
chicken.
Please do that.

606
00:23:57,280 --> 00:23:58,950
Ohh, what?
What time of year is it?

607
00:23:59,000 --> 00:24:01,070
Is it the time where everyone
tells me I've got time Turkey?

608
00:24:01,080 --> 00:24:03,130
Because I guess I'm talking.
Yeah, you have it all round

609
00:24:03,140 --> 00:24:05,050
round round the euro and you
have a point, yeah.

610
00:24:05,180 --> 00:24:08,970
No Ever have Brussels sprouts?
No, no no ohh Christmas bang on

611
00:24:08,980 --> 00:24:10,380
my plate like.
No.

612
00:24:10,390 --> 00:24:12,730
Yes, please.
I'll wrap my dry Turkey round

613
00:24:12,740 --> 00:24:14,510
them next one.
We've got a couple more left.

614
00:24:17,250 --> 00:24:17,940
Right.
Go on.

615
00:24:18,410 --> 00:24:19,560
My God, no.
We're not going there.

616
00:24:19,850 --> 00:24:22,120
Bucks Fizz on mould wine.
Bucks face mould wine is.

617
00:24:22,130 --> 00:24:24,120
Horrible cranberry sauce or
gravy.

618
00:24:24,450 --> 00:24:27,410
Gravy 100% can't have.
Another answer this one Brussel

619
00:24:27,420 --> 00:24:29,640
sprouts or Parsnips?
Parsnips all the way but got

620
00:24:29,650 --> 00:24:32,320
glazing, glazed and parsnips.
Yeah, they are good roast

621
00:24:32,330 --> 00:24:35,660
potatoes or Yorkshire puddings.
That is actually the.

622
00:24:35,670 --> 00:24:38,340
Hardest one.
Right.

623
00:24:38,350 --> 00:24:40,570
You gotta have retailers.
You've got it's gotta be

624
00:24:40,640 --> 00:24:42,230
Christmas Eve buffet or
takeaway.

625
00:24:44,950 --> 00:24:46,200
Takeaway.
OK.

626
00:24:46,210 --> 00:24:47,200
Yeah.
Yeah.

627
00:24:47,250 --> 00:24:50,160
Just Christmas Eve, late night
or early night.

628
00:24:50,230 --> 00:24:52,000
Late, late in the Prosecco OHH.
Next one.

629
00:24:52,010 --> 00:24:53,400
I've read two in one for some
reason.

630
00:24:55,130 --> 00:25:00,840
Over second board games beer
100% Prosecco Taste like

631
00:25:00,850 --> 00:25:03,000
sparkling weed.
Doesn't last one is 4 more?

632
00:25:05,060 --> 00:25:08,790
Last one, last one.
The green triangle or orange

633
00:25:08,800 --> 00:25:10,530
crunch from quality.
Neither of them.

634
00:25:10,840 --> 00:25:12,370
Neither of them.
Neither of them.

635
00:25:12,380 --> 00:25:14,770
No Cadbury's heroes or
celebrations.

636
00:25:15,200 --> 00:25:19,980
Ohh, that's so tough.
I like more of the heroes, so

637
00:25:19,990 --> 00:25:22,400
I'll pick heroes.
But the individual celebrations,

638
00:25:22,410 --> 00:25:27,280
the best ones about matchmakers
after race all day long and last

639
00:25:27,290 --> 00:25:29,300
one actual last one.
Strawberry Delight or Orange

640
00:25:29,310 --> 00:25:30,460
Crunch?
Strawberry Delight.

641
00:25:30,530 --> 00:25:33,860
I will eat 700 of them in a row.
I once got as a gift from a

642
00:25:33,870 --> 00:25:35,160
child because I must have
mentioned it.

643
00:25:35,210 --> 00:25:37,750
A whole box of Strawberry
Delight and he was banging.

644
00:25:37,760 --> 00:25:39,800
It was so good and nice.
But if you didn't like that

645
00:25:39,810 --> 00:25:41,400
segment, well, you're not here
anymore.

646
00:25:41,410 --> 00:25:44,300
So.
You still here then?

647
00:25:44,700 --> 00:25:46,080
I've gotta say, that was really
good.

648
00:25:46,430 --> 00:25:48,620
Thank you Lauren, Lauren for
that this or that was good fun

649
00:25:48,670 --> 00:25:50,160
section and what he wants to
hear.

650
00:25:50,170 --> 00:25:53,350
My opinions more than the I just
realised having done that, I

651
00:25:53,360 --> 00:25:56,420
have some very strong opinions
on food like you do have Very

652
00:25:56,430 --> 00:25:59,240
strong.
To me, food is either really,

653
00:25:59,250 --> 00:26:02,150
really nice or disgusting.
Yeah, there's not much food out

654
00:26:02,160 --> 00:26:04,600
there where I'm like.
Remember that episode where you

655
00:26:04,610 --> 00:26:06,140
were talking about self
diagnosing?

656
00:26:06,490 --> 00:26:09,630
Yeah, yeah, just it reminds me
of that one.

657
00:26:10,150 --> 00:26:11,520
It reminds me of that.
In what way?

658
00:26:11,530 --> 00:26:13,260
I don't know.
I don't know.

659
00:26:13,270 --> 00:26:15,500
I don't know.
Well, you'll be pleased to hear

660
00:26:15,510 --> 00:26:17,830
Hayden and our listeners at home
just paid long term this or

661
00:26:17,840 --> 00:26:18,970
that.
Let me know, by the way, if I'm

662
00:26:18,980 --> 00:26:20,980
horribly wrong or I'm horribly
right.

663
00:26:21,620 --> 00:26:24,390
I've now got a Christmas quiz.
Yay so.

664
00:26:24,430 --> 00:26:26,160
Christmas quiz.
Wait, I'm Anyone on the team?

665
00:26:26,170 --> 00:26:28,270
Yeah, yeah, it's just you.
It's just you, pal.

666
00:26:28,280 --> 00:26:30,850
So I'm gonna find my Christmas
quiz right now.

667
00:26:30,920 --> 00:26:31,320
OK.
And.

668
00:26:31,330 --> 00:26:32,830
While you do that, I'm gonna
give it the spammer.

669
00:26:32,840 --> 00:26:34,570
OK, go on quick disclaim
everybody.

670
00:26:34,580 --> 00:26:36,470
I am absolutely terrible at
quizzes.

671
00:26:36,480 --> 00:26:39,380
My general knowledge is way, way
way worse than the average.

672
00:26:39,390 --> 00:26:43,010
Like 4 year old, I'd say.
I just don't remember.

673
00:26:43,020 --> 00:26:45,300
Anything.
We were at our Christmas do

674
00:26:45,370 --> 00:26:48,480
right the other day and ran by
Scott and I listen to the

675
00:26:48,490 --> 00:26:49,440
podcast sometimes.
Scott.

676
00:26:49,450 --> 00:26:51,280
It was a brilliant quiz.
Thank you for doing that.

677
00:26:51,430 --> 00:26:53,420
But we kind of last minute
decided to go.

678
00:26:53,470 --> 00:26:55,820
So everyone had their teams and
stuff but you and I and our

679
00:26:55,830 --> 00:26:57,770
girlfriends and we took our
babies like everyone.

680
00:26:57,780 --> 00:27:00,480
We were just on our own team.
So a bit smaller And then

681
00:27:00,490 --> 00:27:04,160
someone said Oh well they've got
they've got Dylan Hayden to

682
00:27:04,170 --> 00:27:06,200
which the reply was Hayden
doesn't know anything.

683
00:27:06,210 --> 00:27:08,140
Don't worry me, Dylan.
I think you are.

684
00:27:08,150 --> 00:27:10,730
I reckon you answered genuine.
I'm not exaggerating.

685
00:27:10,740 --> 00:27:14,050
I'd say 95% of the questions
were exclusively answered by

686
00:27:14,060 --> 00:27:17,390
you, 5% were answered by you and
confirmed by me.

687
00:27:18,040 --> 00:27:19,080
And I was like, yeah, I agree
that.

688
00:27:19,320 --> 00:27:21,400
There was one.
There was one where none of us

689
00:27:21,410 --> 00:27:22,930
knew it.
And I said an answer.

690
00:27:23,120 --> 00:27:25,750
And then you and Lauren both
said a different answer that was

691
00:27:25,760 --> 00:27:28,130
the same, but you still won't.
It's not worth it.

692
00:27:28,140 --> 00:27:30,450
Let's just go for his.
Answer kind of.

693
00:27:30,460 --> 00:27:33,090
Guessing it was your answer.
It's not worth if we put the

694
00:27:33,100 --> 00:27:35,310
wrong answer and Dylan was
right, we won't live it down.

695
00:27:36,710 --> 00:27:37,630
Because it wasn't.
Right.

696
00:27:37,730 --> 00:27:39,970
So this quiz I want to play
along at home because I think

697
00:27:39,980 --> 00:27:41,120
this might be actually really
tricky.

698
00:27:41,130 --> 00:27:44,280
I reckon you might get a solid 0
out of five, probably 5.

699
00:27:44,290 --> 00:27:47,400
There's five questions here.
This is called a synonyms quiz.

700
00:27:47,450 --> 00:27:49,940
OK?
And basically, what's a synonym?

701
00:27:50,010 --> 00:27:53,350
A synonym is a word which means
the same as another word.

702
00:27:53,410 --> 00:27:56,180
So for example, a synonym of big
would be Hayden.

703
00:27:56,750 --> 00:27:59,240
So we've got a Tina.
Big would be ginormous.

704
00:27:59,250 --> 00:28:00,100
Massive.
Huge.

705
00:28:00,700 --> 00:28:02,740
Straight for the main word.
Make that words noisy.

706
00:28:02,750 --> 00:28:06,100
And we learn that very soon that
ginormous is not a real word.

707
00:28:06,150 --> 00:28:08,900
So I'm going to read you lyrics
to a song.

708
00:28:09,300 --> 00:28:14,900
I have swapped synonyms in.
OK, I swapped the cinnamon in.

709
00:28:15,310 --> 00:28:18,680
So for example, OK, if the lyric
was, if you give me a lyric of

710
00:28:18,690 --> 00:28:22,320
any old song on the spot.
Now when you watch any song

711
00:28:22,330 --> 00:28:25,820
ever, any song ever, let's just
say a most recent song.

712
00:28:27,310 --> 00:28:29,310
OK Let's just say I came in like
a Wrecking Ball.

713
00:28:29,360 --> 00:28:31,050
OK Would be.
I entered.

714
00:28:31,100 --> 00:28:33,710
Yeah.
Like a demolishing sphere.

715
00:28:33,780 --> 00:28:34,650
OK.
OK.

716
00:28:34,700 --> 00:28:37,250
So I would say that you need to
work out what the lyrics are.

717
00:28:37,260 --> 00:28:38,610
Yeah.
But to get the mark, you tell me

718
00:28:38,620 --> 00:28:41,000
what the song.
Is what the name of the song.

719
00:28:41,040 --> 00:28:42,780
I can't even do the name of the
song if you give me the lyrics

720
00:28:42,790 --> 00:28:46,260
without.
So if you're home, let's play

721
00:28:46,270 --> 00:28:48,150
along.
Ready #1.

722
00:28:48,500 --> 00:28:52,530
Plunge into Yuletide.
Let's converge and Unity step

723
00:28:52,540 --> 00:28:56,450
into Christmas.
Yeah, we can witness the Flakes

724
00:28:56,460 --> 00:28:58,210
descend eternally and
permanently.

725
00:28:58,250 --> 00:28:59,710
Is that the same one?
Yeah.

726
00:29:00,080 --> 00:29:02,090
I haven't finished.
I don't even know the.

727
00:29:02,100 --> 00:29:05,300
Actual plunge into your tide.
Let's converge in unity.

728
00:29:06,020 --> 00:29:09,050
Step into Christmas.
The problem is me and Lauren

729
00:29:09,060 --> 00:29:11,240
sing this song and we replace
every line with Seven to

730
00:29:11,250 --> 00:29:13,460
Christmas.
So I genuinely don't know It's

731
00:29:13,470 --> 00:29:15,540
Christmas.
Yeah, it's Christmas.

732
00:29:15,550 --> 00:29:18,230
Yeah, into Christmas.
Step into Christmas.

733
00:29:18,240 --> 00:29:19,750
And that is genuinely how we
sing it every.

734
00:29:19,760 --> 00:29:21,570
Time.
Well the real lyrics are step

735
00:29:21,580 --> 00:29:23,570
into Christmas.
Let's join together we can watch

736
00:29:23,580 --> 00:29:25,390
the snowfall forever and ever.
Ohh.

737
00:29:25,400 --> 00:29:27,610
So next time you let me finish
the question that's sorry sorry

738
00:29:27,620 --> 00:29:29,690
I got excited.
Let's conversion unity.

739
00:29:29,700 --> 00:29:32,030
We can witness the flakes
descend the timely and

740
00:29:32,040 --> 00:29:34,780
permanently which is we can
watch the snowfall forever and.

741
00:29:34,790 --> 00:29:39,000
Ever one out of 111.
Next one.

742
00:29:39,010 --> 00:29:43,260
I'll tell you when I'm finished.
OK, darling, if your journey

743
00:29:43,270 --> 00:29:46,240
must commence, don't imagine my
anguish intense.

744
00:29:46,810 --> 00:29:49,760
Won't you grant me one more
son's ascent?

745
00:29:51,220 --> 00:29:57,090
What Say again?
Darling, even if you're if your

746
00:29:57,100 --> 00:30:01,470
journey must commence, don't
imagine my anguish.

747
00:30:01,520 --> 00:30:04,890
Intense.
Won't you grant me one more

748
00:30:04,900 --> 00:30:08,360
son's ascent?
That's the one to think about.

749
00:30:08,370 --> 00:30:12,270
I'm gonna give you a hint, OK?
Won't you grant me one more Sons

750
00:30:12,280 --> 00:30:14,620
assent?
You like one more day?

751
00:30:16,150 --> 00:30:19,000
Once you grant me one more son.
Give me one more day, won't you?

752
00:30:19,010 --> 00:30:20,010
Give me.
Give me one more day.

753
00:30:20,020 --> 00:30:23,960
What's that from?
Darling, if your journey must

754
00:30:23,970 --> 00:30:27,520
commence, don't imagine my
anguish Intense.

755
00:30:27,850 --> 00:30:30,740
Won't you grant me one more sons
of sand?

756
00:30:31,430 --> 00:30:32,080
Nope.
That's.

757
00:30:32,090 --> 00:30:34,560
It.
Right.

758
00:30:34,570 --> 00:30:36,230
Have you got at home?
You screaming at the screen,

759
00:30:36,360 --> 00:30:40,030
baby, if you've got to go away.
Ohh.

760
00:30:40,480 --> 00:30:45,550
Don't think I can take a step
into Christmas, Stephen.

761
00:30:45,560 --> 00:30:46,700
It's Christmas.
Yeah, it's.

762
00:30:47,700 --> 00:30:50,020
That is why I did write down.
I remember.

763
00:30:50,030 --> 00:30:52,480
That it's like a.
It's like the east something,

764
00:30:52,490 --> 00:30:54,090
isn't it?
This is something blokes in the

765
00:30:54,100 --> 00:30:58,970
big like woolly like fairy white
outfits A-17 or something.

766
00:30:58,980 --> 00:31:00,490
I don't know.
Stay another day gone wrong

767
00:31:00,500 --> 00:31:02,250
anyway.
Screaming one out, two people at

768
00:31:02,260 --> 00:31:04,150
home like what is this next one
ready.

769
00:31:04,160 --> 00:31:06,510
Yeah.
Propelling myself you'll you'll

770
00:31:06,520 --> 00:31:09,570
would.
My anticipation surpasses

771
00:31:09,580 --> 00:31:12,260
stellar nebulae to glimpse those
visages.

772
00:31:13,520 --> 00:31:18,130
Wait.
Propelling myself your word

773
00:31:18,460 --> 00:31:22,330
Yellowwood what's your what's
your like Christmas OK,

774
00:31:22,340 --> 00:31:26,850
propelling myself your word
Christmas bound Christmas song

775
00:31:26,910 --> 00:31:28,610
would propelling myself your
word.

776
00:31:28,620 --> 00:31:32,030
It's like Ward right?
You all would propelling myself

777
00:31:32,040 --> 00:31:38,720
your world famous direction
scientist Northeast S you Ohh my

778
00:31:38,730 --> 00:31:42,760
anticipation surpasses stellar
nebulae to collapse those

779
00:31:42,770 --> 00:31:49,600
messages Anyone home because he
does not getting this Nope

780
00:31:49,610 --> 00:31:52,760
propelling myself Yule word if I
keep saying like.

781
00:31:53,820 --> 00:31:55,680
What Christmas word isn't the
word?

782
00:31:55,730 --> 00:31:59,280
No, but Chris Wood?
Propelling.

783
00:31:59,750 --> 00:32:01,440
What?
Propelling.

784
00:32:01,870 --> 00:32:04,460
Propelling myself.
You're would shooting.

785
00:32:05,110 --> 00:32:07,640
Shooting, right?
Three seconds, Santa.

786
00:32:08,740 --> 00:32:10,250
She's rebelling.
Not.

787
00:32:11,210 --> 00:32:13,090
Piling.
Yeah, right.

788
00:32:13,130 --> 00:32:15,050
No.
Propelling myself, you would.

789
00:32:15,100 --> 00:32:17,080
I'm driving.
Driving home for.

790
00:32:17,090 --> 00:32:20,270
Christmas Oh, I can't wait to
see those faces.

791
00:32:20,280 --> 00:32:21,730
Christmas would.
I'm still lost on that.

792
00:32:21,740 --> 00:32:24,850
Your word just means Christmas.
You'll would I put this into bar

793
00:32:24,860 --> 00:32:27,910
towards Christmas?
Google I'm driving home

794
00:32:27,920 --> 00:32:30,910
Christmas preparing myself you
would Ohh my anticipation

795
00:32:30,920 --> 00:32:32,530
surpassed I'm driving.
Home.

796
00:32:32,540 --> 00:32:35,050
For Christmas, right.
That's why I'm afraid this is

797
00:32:35,060 --> 00:32:36,080
very successful at home.
You.

798
00:32:37,010 --> 00:32:37,890
Know how?
How?

799
00:32:37,900 --> 00:32:38,790
How much more?
Two.

800
00:32:38,800 --> 00:32:41,670
More.
OK, let's go one out of.

801
00:32:41,680 --> 00:32:44,810
Three next one.
When the frigid flurry chap

802
00:32:44,820 --> 00:32:50,040
brings the icy fluff, well, he
might yearn to comprehend, he

803
00:32:50,050 --> 00:32:52,770
has placed a considerably large
grid on someone's mug.

804
00:32:54,260 --> 00:32:56,200
This makes no sense.
Do it again.

805
00:32:56,790 --> 00:33:00,250
When the frigid flurry chap,
What kind of frigid?

806
00:33:00,260 --> 00:33:04,390
Flurry chap, Be flagged.
Frigid Flurry chap Snowman.

807
00:33:05,440 --> 00:33:09,190
Brings the icy.
Fluff and snowman brings the

808
00:33:09,200 --> 00:33:18,970
snow Booty Doo big smiles.
Hey, do do do do do do do.

809
00:33:19,710 --> 00:33:20,620
Do.
What's that called?

810
00:33:22,190 --> 00:33:24,560
Ohh wow wish.
I wish it could be Christmas

811
00:33:24,570 --> 00:33:26,380
everyday.
Yes, well done after me telling

812
00:33:26,390 --> 00:33:28,200
you.
And the last one ready.

813
00:33:28,450 --> 00:33:31,080
I'll take him out two.
The last one is probably the

814
00:33:31,090 --> 00:33:34,250
hardest one, which is what
happened so far.

815
00:33:34,260 --> 00:33:37,960
Wait for this go.
On OK Ready, fabricating

816
00:33:37,970 --> 00:33:43,230
jubilation and bewilderment
amidst unwanted offerings

817
00:33:44,780 --> 00:33:48,790
singing to me based in spiced
grape libation.

818
00:33:48,860 --> 00:33:51,590
Sounds good.
In tandem with your Spectral

819
00:33:51,600 --> 00:33:54,670
Essence.
Is it a memoir to me?

820
00:33:54,680 --> 00:33:56,970
From you?
No, I said.

821
00:33:56,980 --> 00:33:59,130
From the beginning, I thought,
that's just one more time.

822
00:33:59,200 --> 00:34:05,520
OK, Ready.
OK, fabricating jubilation and

823
00:34:05,530 --> 00:34:09,650
bewilderment.
Admixed unwanted offerings

824
00:34:10,540 --> 00:34:15,449
bathed in spiced grape Lib
libation in tandem with your

825
00:34:15,460 --> 00:34:20,750
Spectral Essence.
Sort of mulled wine, yes, mulled

826
00:34:20,760 --> 00:34:22,580
wine.
Beginning with like, not

827
00:34:22,590 --> 00:34:24,570
wanting.
A mixed unwanted offerings.

828
00:34:25,270 --> 00:34:29,429
So among around presents, I
don't.

829
00:34:29,440 --> 00:34:30,159
Want.
Yeah.

830
00:34:30,170 --> 00:34:30,699
Yeah.
Kind.

831
00:34:30,710 --> 00:34:33,520
Of I don't want, don't want
these presents fabricating,

832
00:34:33,590 --> 00:34:37,540
jubilation and bewilderment,
pretending to be happy and

833
00:34:37,550 --> 00:34:41,010
bewilderment and excited.
Got it?

834
00:34:41,020 --> 00:34:45,260
OK, you saying to be happy and
shocked, I don't know.

835
00:34:45,270 --> 00:34:47,159
OK, feigning.
This is the real one, feigning

836
00:34:47,170 --> 00:34:50,699
joy and surprise at the gifts we
despise over mulled wine.

837
00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:56,929
Ohh, it's that song.
Christmas time by the darkness.

838
00:34:58,890 --> 00:35:00,170
Yes.
Start way.

839
00:35:00,180 --> 00:35:02,300
I never would have got it.
So if you want to know where

840
00:35:02,310 --> 00:35:04,710
that came from, go and listen to
The Darkness Christmas time.

841
00:35:06,220 --> 00:35:08,220
Ohh 5, that was pretty tricky,
wasn't it?

842
00:35:08,230 --> 00:35:10,440
That was hard.
It was not easy hard, especially

843
00:35:10,450 --> 00:35:11,460
when you can't see it written
down.

844
00:35:11,470 --> 00:35:13,740
Actually, asked Mick, trying to
remember what you said.

845
00:35:13,750 --> 00:35:19,040
So you get the brilliant game
for a Monday learning tune into

846
00:35:19,050 --> 00:35:21,660
next year's.
Christmas special When we won't,

847
00:35:21,730 --> 00:35:25,230
we will have learned.
That game will have this out

848
00:35:25,240 --> 00:35:26,630
again though, cause we'll put it
somewhere.

849
00:35:26,680 --> 00:35:28,210
Yeah, and hopefully my head.
Doesn't.

850
00:35:28,220 --> 00:35:30,340
Maybe we can pick up, they can
pick up one of these in our

851
00:35:30,350 --> 00:35:33,460
merch store.
Yeah, yeah, with very quick

852
00:35:33,470 --> 00:35:34,710
phone.
I didn't bring it.

853
00:35:34,820 --> 00:35:36,790
Didn't bring what?
I've got a gift for you to.

854
00:35:36,800 --> 00:35:37,810
Do much thought.
Yeah.

855
00:35:37,820 --> 00:35:39,370
Was it for the podcast?
Yeah.

856
00:35:39,380 --> 00:35:40,850
No way.
Yeah.

857
00:35:40,860 --> 00:35:41,800
I'll give it to you for next
podcast.

858
00:35:41,810 --> 00:35:42,850
Why don't we do it?
Another real.

859
00:35:42,860 --> 00:35:45,100
OK, we'll do it.
We'll do it.

860
00:35:45,110 --> 00:35:46,870
We'll do it in a box or a real
or something.

861
00:35:46,880 --> 00:35:48,810
So that means you guys
listening, you have to make sure

862
00:35:48,820 --> 00:35:51,050
you're following on Instagram at
Teach Sleep, Repeat Podcast, and

863
00:35:51,060 --> 00:35:53,300
you're gonna listen to our prize
episodes and you're gonna watch

864
00:35:53,310 --> 00:35:55,270
our reels.
Quickly talk about reviews

865
00:35:55,280 --> 00:35:57,500
because.
There's no problem guys.

866
00:35:57,510 --> 00:36:00,430
We've got loads of reviews I
must say we're very sorry about.

867
00:36:01,030 --> 00:36:03,690
Don't worry about it then.
But the point is we are super

868
00:36:03,700 --> 00:36:06,390
heavily weighted on Spotify
because we pushed Spotify is the

869
00:36:06,400 --> 00:36:08,890
thing we we use we we don't have
iPhones or anything like that.

870
00:36:09,360 --> 00:36:11,660
But it just means that iPhone
reviews are lagging behind.

871
00:36:11,670 --> 00:36:13,340
So if you listen to this and you
have an iPhone or you're

872
00:36:13,350 --> 00:36:15,470
listening on Apple podcast
because there's more of you than

873
00:36:15,480 --> 00:36:18,630
there are reviews obviously
because we all analytics guys,

874
00:36:18,640 --> 00:36:22,130
please can you give us a review
and podcast because we have

875
00:36:22,200 --> 00:36:26,140
fewer on there which means that
penalty one star not there's

876
00:36:26,150 --> 00:36:30,490
that pesky one star is being
affecting the overall one more.

877
00:36:32,010 --> 00:36:34,150
Anyway, thank you Dylan, right?
Join us after the Jingle because

878
00:36:34,160 --> 00:36:36,040
we're gonna talk about Secret
Santa.

879
00:36:38,300 --> 00:36:42,090
So this is the first year that I
have not taken part in Secret

880
00:36:42,100 --> 00:36:44,480
Santa and I don't know if you've
been doing any Secret Santa

881
00:36:44,490 --> 00:36:45,910
this.
Year first, probably the first

882
00:36:45,920 --> 00:36:47,050
year.
I don't know what it is.

883
00:36:47,060 --> 00:36:49,470
Maybe it's that post COVID time.
You know, no one, no one cares

884
00:36:49,480 --> 00:36:51,550
about these things anymore.
But I want your opinions on it,

885
00:36:51,560 --> 00:36:53,230
OK?
What, like Secret Santa?

886
00:36:53,240 --> 00:36:55,380
Yeah, it's such a huge thing in
our culture.

887
00:36:56,590 --> 00:36:57,550
What do you think?
About it.

888
00:36:57,560 --> 00:36:58,900
Well, I'm gonna be really
honest.

889
00:36:58,950 --> 00:37:01,680
Yeah, 99% of the time it's a
complete waste of money.

890
00:37:01,690 --> 00:37:03,200
Cause he's not.
Because he's not even real, is

891
00:37:03,210 --> 00:37:05,380
he?
Is that what it is, Hayden?

892
00:37:05,390 --> 00:37:07,730
I worked that out.
And stop it, stop it, cause

893
00:37:07,740 --> 00:37:09,390
we'll talk about that later,
Yeah.

894
00:37:09,430 --> 00:37:12,560
No, I think Secret Santa, I
think it's hugely weighted on

895
00:37:12,570 --> 00:37:16,480
who you deal with.
So Secret Santa at work, right?

896
00:37:16,570 --> 00:37:20,120
99% of the time you're just
struggling because one, the

897
00:37:20,130 --> 00:37:22,870
budget is never big enough.
There's like 5 LB budget.

898
00:37:22,880 --> 00:37:25,420
What is 5 LB?
Get a penny sweet with this

899
00:37:25,430 --> 00:37:29,870
inflation, get nothing for ��5.
So it's always really stuff you

900
00:37:29,880 --> 00:37:31,530
don't need because it's less
than ��5.

901
00:37:31,580 --> 00:37:34,670
I do just buy it for myself.
So it's it's and then then

902
00:37:34,680 --> 00:37:37,070
you're buying for someone in
your school you might draw

903
00:37:37,080 --> 00:37:40,240
someone you never speak to so
you don't know them, so you know

904
00:37:40,250 --> 00:37:42,240
it's gonna be a waste of money
anyway and then somebody doesn't

905
00:37:42,250 --> 00:37:43,750
know you has got you as well.
So what?

906
00:37:43,760 --> 00:37:46,290
You received crap.
So it just overall it's a nice

907
00:37:46,300 --> 00:37:48,450
thing to do but it's very rarely
actually useful.

908
00:37:48,540 --> 00:37:52,210
The only time I've ever enjoyed
Secret Santa was when at work it

909
00:37:52,220 --> 00:37:55,360
happened to be someone who kind
of I knew quite well and then it

910
00:37:55,370 --> 00:37:57,880
was funny.
Or whenever we did it with my

911
00:37:57,890 --> 00:37:58,650
friends.
Wow.

912
00:37:58,660 --> 00:37:59,780
Join for the Christmas Spirit
here.

913
00:37:59,790 --> 00:38:01,940
Guys hates Christmas.
No, I don't.

914
00:38:02,110 --> 00:38:05,400
As we do Secret Santa with our
mates and there was a ��10 or a

915
00:38:05,410 --> 00:38:08,310
��15 budget, which again, wasn't
much, yeah, but because we knew

916
00:38:08,320 --> 00:38:11,190
each other so well, when whoever
we got, we just went down the

917
00:38:11,200 --> 00:38:13,500
theme of just make it funny,
Yeah, so it was always really

918
00:38:13,510 --> 00:38:14,900
funny.
Personal was, yeah, literally.

919
00:38:14,910 --> 00:38:17,640
So I used to make on Photoshop.
I used to spend my money on a

920
00:38:17,650 --> 00:38:20,380
frame alright is that was that's
how much I used to spend.

921
00:38:20,470 --> 00:38:24,080
But then on Photoshop I would
find all different things that

922
00:38:24,090 --> 00:38:27,380
they like, or inside jokes and
stuff that we've had in the past

923
00:38:27,420 --> 00:38:30,340
and fill out this a I know.
How did that make?

924
00:38:30,350 --> 00:38:32,300
You I know no, because who do
you get to print it every?

925
00:38:32,310 --> 00:38:33,090
Time.
Yeah, I know.

926
00:38:33,100 --> 00:38:34,980
Because you got the printer.
Can you print this?

927
00:38:34,990 --> 00:38:36,170
For me?
And you're looking that like,

928
00:38:36,180 --> 00:38:38,020
why is Danny DeVito wearing a
watch?

929
00:38:38,030 --> 00:38:42,490
It bag Why isn't this my gift?
So yeah, I used to make that

930
00:38:42,500 --> 00:38:44,910
every year, which was really
fun, and then they've got

931
00:38:44,920 --> 00:38:46,940
something.
But last year I got a collage or

932
00:38:46,950 --> 00:38:50,060
the year before of all the
different game shows I've been

933
00:38:50,070 --> 00:38:51,360
on and different quiz shows and
stuff.

934
00:38:51,370 --> 00:38:53,450
You know, game shows.
Yeah, have you have mentioned

935
00:38:53,460 --> 00:38:55,480
that?
But anyway, Secret Santa, I

936
00:38:55,490 --> 00:38:58,350
think most of the time if you're
doing it with the wrong people,

937
00:38:58,360 --> 00:38:59,730
it's a waste of money.
It's rubbish.

938
00:38:59,770 --> 00:39:02,160
I've just realised, I've just
realised something.

939
00:39:02,390 --> 00:39:04,500
I am doing Secret Santa.
How are you all?

940
00:39:04,510 --> 00:39:07,080
You better get on that then.
Because, no, I've done this

941
00:39:07,150 --> 00:39:09,680
because my family made the
decision, which by the way, I'm

942
00:39:09,690 --> 00:39:13,680
all for and I love it, all the
adults in our family, Secret

943
00:39:13,690 --> 00:39:15,910
Santa with a larger budget, but
that's it.

944
00:39:15,920 --> 00:39:17,160
But that's it.
But you don't get a gift to

945
00:39:17,170 --> 00:39:19,210
everybody else.
So I've got three sisters,

946
00:39:19,220 --> 00:39:22,450
obviously Mum and Dad.
Yeah, the my like in the direct

947
00:39:22,460 --> 00:39:24,230
family there with all the
partners and stuff.

948
00:39:24,300 --> 00:39:27,770
We grew up with our partners and
then only one other partner will

949
00:39:27,780 --> 00:39:29,960
buy for us and we've only got to
buy for one part.

950
00:39:29,970 --> 00:39:32,020
I'm like, Oh my God.
So there's a higher threshold.

951
00:39:32,030 --> 00:39:33,410
You'll spend more.
You never spend that much on

952
00:39:33,420 --> 00:39:35,690
them normally, but you can just
get them some.

953
00:39:35,700 --> 00:39:37,470
Details rather than getting six
partners.

954
00:39:38,220 --> 00:39:39,770
Socks, socks.
Socks.

955
00:39:39,780 --> 00:39:42,030
Get this one person so you
haven't sorted out the present

956
00:39:42,040 --> 00:39:45,180
we have.
Forgot because it so long ago I

957
00:39:45,190 --> 00:39:47,390
was like I'll call but then I
have to think about one person.

958
00:39:47,400 --> 00:39:48,870
The other blokes out there,
Well, no.

959
00:39:48,970 --> 00:39:51,590
Yeah, this is code talk for my
partner saw it out.

960
00:39:51,900 --> 00:39:53,830
I completely forgot about it and
my family.

961
00:39:53,840 --> 00:39:54,830
I picked this.
Did you?

962
00:39:54,840 --> 00:39:55,870
Yeah.
It's good for you.

963
00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:58,470
I tell you what, since Rory's
come, have you found that buying

964
00:39:58,480 --> 00:40:00,410
presents way easier?
I bought single one.

965
00:40:00,740 --> 00:40:02,310
OK, that's good.
Other than for Lauren.

966
00:40:04,930 --> 00:40:08,010
Right, Yeah.
It's got one day to go.

967
00:40:08,900 --> 00:40:13,590
Ohh my gosh.
Ohh mate, now I've got some

968
00:40:13,600 --> 00:40:16,520
others as well, but she no they
weren't picked by her so she'll

969
00:40:16,530 --> 00:40:17,840
hate them.
We weren't going to do anything

970
00:40:17,850 --> 00:40:19,510
this year.
And I was like, I just can't.

971
00:40:19,580 --> 00:40:20,630
So I did.
Yeah.

972
00:40:20,720 --> 00:40:22,270
We were gonna buy ourselves a
new bed.

973
00:40:22,360 --> 00:40:24,210
Ohh.
Now that just growing up proper.

974
00:40:24,310 --> 00:40:26,130
Yeah.
We need better relations called

975
00:40:26,140 --> 00:40:27,210
Christmas.
To each other.

976
00:40:27,220 --> 00:40:28,690
We've done that before.
Because beds are bloody

977
00:40:28,700 --> 00:40:30,380
expensive, by the way.
Why is everything so?

978
00:40:30,390 --> 00:40:33,230
Anyway, back to Secret Santa.
What do you think?

979
00:40:33,240 --> 00:40:36,310
Because I I look back, I got a
Justin Bieber calendar once and

980
00:40:36,320 --> 00:40:38,710
I was like, yeah, and I gotta
choke the chicken pair of

981
00:40:38,720 --> 00:40:40,570
underwear from a middle-aged
woman at Asda.

982
00:40:40,640 --> 00:40:42,310
When I went to Asda and I was
like nice.

983
00:40:42,380 --> 00:40:43,710
I don't know.
Haha.

984
00:40:43,800 --> 00:40:45,630
I think.
Thanks Hun Bye.

985
00:40:45,640 --> 00:40:47,970
I'm 17.
This is weird.

986
00:40:48,400 --> 00:40:49,670
I don't know.
It's all right, isn't it?

987
00:40:49,680 --> 00:40:50,820
I suppose.
I think it's supposed to be a

988
00:40:50,830 --> 00:40:52,050
laugh when it gets taken too
seriously.

989
00:40:52,060 --> 00:40:53,880
That's when it's just cringe and
kind of awkward.

990
00:40:53,890 --> 00:40:56,070
The only one we've done at work
a couple of years ago.

991
00:40:56,080 --> 00:40:59,610
It was the last one anyway, so
someone got me.

992
00:41:01,120 --> 00:41:02,710
And I think she listens.
I think she.

993
00:41:02,750 --> 00:41:05,660
Ohh yeah OK alright.
And it's probably the best

994
00:41:05,670 --> 00:41:07,060
Secret Santa gift I've ever had
really.

995
00:41:07,070 --> 00:41:10,820
Because it was.
It was a hair brush and some

996
00:41:10,830 --> 00:41:12,430
like shampoo.
People listening, like, why is

997
00:41:12,440 --> 00:41:13,990
that funny?
Yeah, it's funny because if you

998
00:41:14,000 --> 00:41:16,900
look at this hat, oh, oh, oh, oh
better.

999
00:41:16,910 --> 00:41:18,940
There's banter.
That's banter.

1000
00:41:19,210 --> 00:41:20,600
Bold.
I didn't tell you, did I?

1001
00:41:20,610 --> 00:41:23,220
You were paternity leave, so
obviously I was.

1002
00:41:23,530 --> 00:41:24,930
Yeah.
You must get chilly with all

1003
00:41:24,940 --> 00:41:26,860
that lack of air.
You're on maternity leave.

1004
00:41:26,870 --> 00:41:30,360
So I was chatting to the kids,
obviously, about you and I've

1005
00:41:30,410 --> 00:41:34,020
managed to convince.
I think it was six of them.

1006
00:41:34,190 --> 00:41:35,880
What to get you for your end of
year gift.

1007
00:41:35,930 --> 00:41:36,800
Ohh.
Yeah.

1008
00:41:36,870 --> 00:41:38,540
So wait and see.
That's nice.

1009
00:41:38,550 --> 00:41:40,200
Yeah.
Wonder what that could be.

1010
00:41:40,670 --> 00:41:42,000
Wonder how Lack imagination.
I.

1011
00:41:42,010 --> 00:41:44,280
Have I wonder if it's the
present I've received 19 Times

1012
00:41:44,290 --> 00:41:47,470
Now from children.
One kid, one kid last.

1013
00:41:47,480 --> 00:41:49,770
He got me a week, genuinely poor
in a wig.

1014
00:41:49,780 --> 00:41:51,190
And I was like, fair play to
you, I wore.

1015
00:41:51,200 --> 00:41:53,250
It and he's going to different
school now, so alright.

1016
00:41:54,400 --> 00:41:56,230
See you later, it's all good
banter.

1017
00:41:56,270 --> 00:41:59,670
No, I don't know.
I guess I look back at Secret

1018
00:41:59,680 --> 00:42:03,120
Santa and it's kind of dwarfed
by actual gifts, which I

1019
00:42:03,130 --> 00:42:05,020
appreciated.
And especially like, you know,

1020
00:42:05,030 --> 00:42:06,910
we always talk about with the
kids when they get us gifts and

1021
00:42:06,920 --> 00:42:09,550
stuff.
And we always say, obviously no

1022
00:42:09,560 --> 00:42:12,340
one expects gifts.
Like we're not going to pretend

1023
00:42:12,350 --> 00:42:14,180
that we sit there and think, oh,
they got me a gift.

1024
00:42:14,190 --> 00:42:16,330
They didn't know.
But when they do, we're sort of

1025
00:42:16,340 --> 00:42:18,380
appreciative.
We still like it.

1026
00:42:18,390 --> 00:42:22,420
What's your If you were to think
back over your career, what's

1027
00:42:22,430 --> 00:42:24,450
your most memorable gift that
you've?

1028
00:42:24,460 --> 00:42:27,520
Been given from children?
Yeah, well, mine was not.

1029
00:42:27,530 --> 00:42:28,960
You're probably expecting some
soppy.

1030
00:42:28,970 --> 00:42:31,040
Answer No no because I said
memorable for a.

1031
00:42:31,050 --> 00:42:34,150
Reason once Funny.
OK, this is this is funny to me.

1032
00:42:34,160 --> 00:42:37,010
You know kind of like evil way.
I was working with your

1033
00:42:37,020 --> 00:42:41,030
girlfriend, your Lauren.
We, you know, we met years ago,

1034
00:42:41,040 --> 00:42:42,540
but we were working together at
school.

1035
00:42:42,550 --> 00:42:45,130
This must have been like 7-8
years ago now, 889 years ago

1036
00:42:45,140 --> 00:42:45,960
maybe.
I don't know.

1037
00:42:46,020 --> 00:42:49,470
And we we had some.
We were in the same year group

1038
00:42:49,480 --> 00:42:52,530
and we had kids that we both
thought they were just like our

1039
00:42:52,540 --> 00:42:53,990
math sets or English sets or
whatever.

1040
00:42:54,160 --> 00:42:56,950
They came in with some Christmas
gifts and really lovely.

1041
00:42:56,960 --> 00:42:59,760
And there's one boy there wasn't
in my class, Was in Lauren's

1042
00:42:59,770 --> 00:43:02,270
class.
Came in with a bottle of Tub of

1043
00:43:02,280 --> 00:43:04,280
Heroes.
But you taught him, I thought.

1044
00:43:04,660 --> 00:43:07,250
That was it.
But he was in Lawrence class and

1045
00:43:07,320 --> 00:43:09,300
came in with a tub of heroes.
That was the only, that was the

1046
00:43:09,310 --> 00:43:13,110
only gift and I I think the mum
had that.

1047
00:43:13,120 --> 00:43:14,990
Give this to the teachers, they
can share it in.

1048
00:43:15,000 --> 00:43:16,990
The yeah, of course.
You came straight to me and

1049
00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:18,770
went.
There you go Mr Stephen, I got

1050
00:43:18,780 --> 00:43:22,970
this for you and Lauren was
there and saw it and was like in

1051
00:43:22,980 --> 00:43:27,570
my class and got you a gift but.
Actually, she was like, wow, if

1052
00:43:27,580 --> 00:43:29,130
he's got you that wonder, he's
got me.

1053
00:43:29,230 --> 00:43:32,010
Absolutely nothing like put that
box here at home.

1054
00:43:34,030 --> 00:43:36,640
So that to me always comes to my
head when people ask about kids

1055
00:43:36,650 --> 00:43:38,260
gift because it just it just
cracks.

1056
00:43:38,270 --> 00:43:39,600
Me.
This sums them up then it yeah,

1057
00:43:39,610 --> 00:43:41,060
they get in there.
So funny.

1058
00:43:41,070 --> 00:43:43,300
Do you have any like funny ones
or memorable?

1059
00:43:43,310 --> 00:43:45,440
Ones I've got memorable ones
like you always get the same.

1060
00:43:45,450 --> 00:43:48,220
Old things where memorable in
that I've still got some up in

1061
00:43:48,230 --> 00:43:50,860
my house like well before we
moved anyway.

1062
00:43:50,910 --> 00:43:53,980
Acrostic poems that people had
framed and stuff.

1063
00:43:54,030 --> 00:43:55,410
All that.
All that good stuff that you

1064
00:43:55,420 --> 00:43:57,140
always remember.
One year I got this really nice

1065
00:43:57,150 --> 00:44:00,550
like tankard made of glass with
this really cool pattern on the

1066
00:44:00,560 --> 00:44:02,580
front, like a ship.
It was so nice.

1067
00:44:02,590 --> 00:44:05,180
I still got it now, like it's
enough for a pint, but it's like

1068
00:44:05,190 --> 00:44:06,650
a proper sturdy thing.
Nice.

1069
00:44:06,660 --> 00:44:10,620
And my I've got two, so one
wasn't really a gift, but I'll

1070
00:44:10,630 --> 00:44:11,940
say it in a minute.
It was funny.

1071
00:44:12,010 --> 00:44:14,200
The the one I always remember.
I think I said this in the

1072
00:44:14,210 --> 00:44:17,620
podcast before because like I
always say with gifts, it is

1073
00:44:17,630 --> 00:44:18,760
literally the thought that
counts.

1074
00:44:18,770 --> 00:44:22,740
To me the objective thing of the
actual gift is lovely.

1075
00:44:22,750 --> 00:44:25,210
Of course if someone gets like a
nice glass, that's really nice

1076
00:44:25,220 --> 00:44:26,510
and I'll use that and stuff like
that.

1077
00:44:26,520 --> 00:44:29,270
And especially if it's like
personalised or from the kid,

1078
00:44:29,280 --> 00:44:31,520
especially handmade and stuff, I
would really appreciate them.

1079
00:44:31,560 --> 00:44:34,650
But there's one always sticks
with me because this boy used to

1080
00:44:34,660 --> 00:44:36,960
walk through the classroom at
break time whilst I was marking

1081
00:44:36,970 --> 00:44:38,200
or no lunchtime.
Sorry.

1082
00:44:38,290 --> 00:44:40,460
He'd come in to grab something
out of his train most days.

1083
00:44:40,470 --> 00:44:42,430
And, you know, these kids always
wanted to find a reason to come

1084
00:44:42,440 --> 00:44:45,410
in.
And there was one day I was sat

1085
00:44:45,420 --> 00:44:47,570
in and I was, I had a strawberry
Ribena.

1086
00:44:47,860 --> 00:44:48,990
Right.
I was just drinking up in the

1087
00:44:49,000 --> 00:44:49,650
shop.
Yeah.

1088
00:44:49,660 --> 00:44:51,230
And he came and went Strawberry
Ribena.

1089
00:44:51,290 --> 00:44:53,000
And I was like, yeah, I love it.
I love strawberry.

1090
00:44:53,010 --> 00:44:55,490
And I was like, oh, OK walked
out, didn't think nothing of it.

1091
00:44:55,500 --> 00:44:57,490
Months later, it came to
Christmas.

1092
00:44:57,500 --> 00:45:00,570
We started the year.
My gift was, I wrapped up bottle

1093
00:45:00,580 --> 00:45:01,180
of strawberry.
Right.

1094
00:45:01,820 --> 00:45:04,730
So it was just from the shop
wrapped up in like literally in

1095
00:45:04,740 --> 00:45:06,950
Christmas wrapping.
And I was like no idea what it

1096
00:45:06,960 --> 00:45:08,170
was.
And it came and opened it up and

1097
00:45:08,180 --> 00:45:11,250
I was like, Oh my God.
That's the idea of him, his mum

1098
00:45:11,260 --> 00:45:12,310
obviously saying what should we
get?

1099
00:45:12,320 --> 00:45:14,650
Mr. Price And Strawberry Ribena
was like, ohh.

1100
00:45:14,660 --> 00:45:16,180
It's like it's not the monetary
thing that counts.

1101
00:45:16,290 --> 00:45:19,050
No, I tell you what just
reminded me something happened

1102
00:45:19,060 --> 00:45:20,910
really recently.
Same sort of like just get you

1103
00:45:20,920 --> 00:45:22,960
in the feels a little bit but
you just realise that they do

1104
00:45:22,970 --> 00:45:26,170
care about you.
Yeah obviously when I went off I

1105
00:45:26,180 --> 00:45:31,270
came back, sorry from paternity
leave and a boy in my class gave

1106
00:45:31,280 --> 00:45:33,700
me a little bag like little gift
bag of something in it for the

1107
00:45:33,710 --> 00:45:36,350
baby and I was like, oh that's
really, that's really nice and

1108
00:45:36,360 --> 00:45:38,570
open the little Christmas card
that came with it as well.

1109
00:45:38,800 --> 00:45:42,640
And he said, I hope you like it.
I had to do extra reading to get

1110
00:45:42,650 --> 00:45:45,150
these.
So the idea was like his mom

1111
00:45:45,160 --> 00:45:47,950
said, alright, we'll get the
baby a gift if you do some extra

1112
00:45:47,960 --> 00:45:50,010
reading.
Ohh, that's so sweet.

1113
00:45:50,020 --> 00:45:50,830
And he's just ohh.
It's.

1114
00:45:50,840 --> 00:45:53,500
Just well, if you wanna get him
to read more in the future to

1115
00:45:53,510 --> 00:45:55,550
whack him out.
More baby, More baby.

1116
00:45:55,560 --> 00:45:58,120
The only way?
There is one other thing I I

1117
00:45:58,130 --> 00:46:01,250
just need to say because I get
it so often, and it is to do

1118
00:46:01,260 --> 00:46:02,740
with that.
It's anything to do with working

1119
00:46:02,750 --> 00:46:05,510
because of the socks with
gerkins before.

1120
00:46:05,520 --> 00:46:08,010
I've had literally jars of
gerkins that people have wrapped

1121
00:46:08,020 --> 00:46:09,140
up.
If you don't know what I mean,

1122
00:46:09,150 --> 00:46:10,610
well, you've been listening to
all the podcast.

1123
00:46:10,620 --> 00:46:14,510
You go back and listen to them.
But yeah, it's always the

1124
00:46:14,520 --> 00:46:16,170
thoughtful things that stick in
my memory.

1125
00:46:16,270 --> 00:46:17,930
That's true.
Because I literally, when I was

1126
00:46:17,940 --> 00:46:20,400
thinking about this earlier, I
looked back at old photos I'd

1127
00:46:20,410 --> 00:46:23,890
taken and honestly, 90% of the
gift I was like, ohh, yeah, ohh

1128
00:46:23,900 --> 00:46:24,950
yeah, I've just forgotten about
it.

1129
00:46:24,960 --> 00:46:27,270
Yeah, yeah.
But the ones that stick in and

1130
00:46:27,280 --> 00:46:29,660
this story always sticks to me
because it's the day of

1131
00:46:29,670 --> 00:46:32,360
Christmas and I might have told
this before, like one of our

1132
00:46:32,370 --> 00:46:34,320
very first podcasts.
If you remember this story, let

1133
00:46:34,330 --> 00:46:36,220
us know.
If you don't, there was this

1134
00:46:36,230 --> 00:46:37,800
story that will stick with me
forever.

1135
00:46:38,410 --> 00:46:41,200
I was teaching year four, I
think it was my first or second

1136
00:46:41,210 --> 00:46:43,590
year of teaching.
And the children always get your

1137
00:46:43,600 --> 00:46:44,140
cards.
Don't.

1138
00:46:44,150 --> 00:46:45,930
It's lovely because they bring
cards in for the class, they

1139
00:46:45,940 --> 00:46:47,760
hand them out and they usually
have one for you as well.

1140
00:46:47,890 --> 00:46:51,640
And when children write a card,
it is usually either Dear Mr.

1141
00:46:51,650 --> 00:46:55,630
Price from Blank or it will be
something funny.

1142
00:46:55,640 --> 00:46:57,650
They've drawn a picture in there
they go over the top.

1143
00:46:57,660 --> 00:47:00,190
Yeah.
And well, this kid had written a

1144
00:47:00,200 --> 00:47:02,030
card.
He gave it to me and scurried

1145
00:47:02,040 --> 00:47:04,250
off, right, Scurried off back to
his desk.

1146
00:47:04,260 --> 00:47:06,170
And I was like, OK, they
normally wait and watch you open

1147
00:47:06,180 --> 00:47:07,890
it and stuff.
So I was like, OK, But he looked

1148
00:47:07,900 --> 00:47:10,150
like he was up to something.
So I opened it thinking that,

1149
00:47:10,300 --> 00:47:14,070
and I read it and it said, Dear
Mr. Price, Merry Christmas.

1150
00:47:14,480 --> 00:47:18,490
By the way, I know Santa isn't
real from blank.

1151
00:47:18,640 --> 00:47:21,360
I remember reading it and I just
looked up and he was sat at his

1152
00:47:21,370 --> 00:47:24,840
desk just staring.
But like, he knew that he wasn't

1153
00:47:24,850 --> 00:47:25,970
to tell anyone.
He wasn't.

1154
00:47:26,360 --> 00:47:29,150
He wasn't going to mention it.
Wink little thing between me and

1155
00:47:29,160 --> 00:47:30,680
you, pal.
I know he's not real.

1156
00:47:30,730 --> 00:47:32,200
Yeah, he's probably making sure
you knew.

1157
00:47:32,210 --> 00:47:35,990
As well, just in case there is a
story about how I found out.

1158
00:47:36,150 --> 00:47:37,160
Yeah.
If.

1159
00:47:37,270 --> 00:47:40,040
Well, I don't know.
What do you think?

1160
00:47:40,050 --> 00:47:41,920
So we've got children now.
Yeah.

1161
00:47:41,930 --> 00:47:44,580
So obviously they're going to
believe in Father Christmas,

1162
00:47:44,590 --> 00:47:46,440
Tooth Fairy, Easter Bunny,
which, by the way, they're

1163
00:47:46,450 --> 00:47:49,230
listening, are all real.
And now's the time to turn off

1164
00:47:49,240 --> 00:47:52,490
the podcast.
Now we've done that, obviously

1165
00:47:52,500 --> 00:47:55,350
there are fake, so I don't know.
How are you gonna approach that

1166
00:47:55,360 --> 00:47:56,570
with your girl?
I don't know.

1167
00:47:56,580 --> 00:47:59,100
I was having this conversation
yesterday with we had a visitor

1168
00:47:59,180 --> 00:48:01,390
who is also a parent, but
they're but her children are

1169
00:48:01,400 --> 00:48:02,950
like 10-11 years old, that kind
of age.

1170
00:48:02,960 --> 00:48:04,110
Well, they know, But then, don't
they?

1171
00:48:04,120 --> 00:48:05,680
Yeah.
Well, I don't know.

1172
00:48:05,690 --> 00:48:06,850
Some kids do and some kids
don't.

1173
00:48:06,860 --> 00:48:08,070
I'm trying to think back to me,
right?

1174
00:48:08,080 --> 00:48:10,800
And I know you're gonna talk
about you in a second, but I'm

1175
00:48:10,810 --> 00:48:14,190
pretty sure.
I'm pretty sure I worked it out,

1176
00:48:14,430 --> 00:48:17,080
but fairly young.
But I went along with it because

1177
00:48:17,090 --> 00:48:19,990
I was very aware that.
Did you work out before you were

1178
00:48:20,000 --> 00:48:20,820
told?
Yeah.

1179
00:48:20,830 --> 00:48:22,940
You don't even know if I was
ever told.

1180
00:48:22,950 --> 00:48:25,300
Well, I remember being kicks in
a Catholic school thinking this

1181
00:48:25,310 --> 00:48:28,010
is wrong, like, and I was being
told my no, I'm not trying to be

1182
00:48:28,020 --> 00:48:29,180
funny.
Yeah, I remember being told with

1183
00:48:29,190 --> 00:48:30,210
my teacher this is what
happened.

1184
00:48:30,220 --> 00:48:32,440
And I remember thinking, Nah,
yeah, that's like the idea of

1185
00:48:32,450 --> 00:48:34,780
Father Christmas.
Also, I was a bit like but does

1186
00:48:34,790 --> 00:48:36,620
he really?
Yeah, I think I was probably

1187
00:48:36,630 --> 00:48:39,180
very, very similar, sort of like
in a religious school, just

1188
00:48:39,190 --> 00:48:41,690
thinking, I don't really, I
don't really think this is true.

1189
00:48:41,700 --> 00:48:45,000
I think that just sort of
stories to make us live better.

1190
00:48:46,360 --> 00:48:50,200
Didn't happen of the year.
It's actually a social construct

1191
00:48:50,390 --> 00:48:52,300
to try and control the masses
and give them hope.

1192
00:48:52,390 --> 00:48:57,540
I did and I started a podcast.
But no, I definitely, I

1193
00:48:57,550 --> 00:48:59,660
definitely knew that Santa
wasn't real.

1194
00:48:59,670 --> 00:49:01,460
But it was the thing that we
pretended because it was really

1195
00:49:01,470 --> 00:49:04,080
nice because my mum and my
parents and my family bought me

1196
00:49:04,090 --> 00:49:05,880
gifts.
So I always remember

1197
00:49:05,890 --> 00:49:07,900
appreciating the fact that they
bought me those gifts.

1198
00:49:07,910 --> 00:49:10,940
I never thought Santa Claus
brought me those gifts and my

1199
00:49:10,950 --> 00:49:13,350
mum and didn't get me anything.
Yeah, like I knew that wasn't

1200
00:49:13,360 --> 00:49:15,820
the thing.
Like I get taken out to buy my

1201
00:49:15,830 --> 00:49:18,750
mum gifts.
It's like the kids aren't

1202
00:49:18,760 --> 00:49:20,430
clocking on.
But when the adults are taking

1203
00:49:20,440 --> 00:49:22,250
you, always go buy your dad a
gift for you today.

1204
00:49:22,260 --> 00:49:24,070
Go get your data gives get uncle
a gift as well.

1205
00:49:24,140 --> 00:49:26,410
So OK, so we buy gifts for
everyone that Santa gives them

1206
00:49:26,420 --> 00:49:28,110
for me and you don't.
Got it.

1207
00:49:28,260 --> 00:49:30,680
Thanks, Mum.
Like of course we just worked it

1208
00:49:30,690 --> 00:49:33,350
out.
So I don't think we'll ever have

1209
00:49:33,360 --> 00:49:35,080
to tell our kids.
I just don't think that will

1210
00:49:35,090 --> 00:49:38,550
have to be a thing unless they
get to like 14 and we're

1211
00:49:38,560 --> 00:49:41,490
thinking this is they're going
to get embarrassing.

1212
00:49:41,680 --> 00:49:43,520
We need to sit them down and
tell them.

1213
00:49:45,040 --> 00:49:48,360
No, it's a weird one because I I
completely agree with you,

1214
00:49:48,410 --> 00:49:49,590
right?
And obviously I'm gonna go along

1215
00:49:49,600 --> 00:49:53,240
with it as much as possible, but
I feel like sometimes it's more

1216
00:49:53,250 --> 00:49:55,620
for the parents than the kids.
And especially when they get to

1217
00:49:55,630 --> 00:49:58,800
a certain age.
It's like, OK, if for example,

1218
00:49:58,810 --> 00:50:01,520
Rory clearly doesn't believe in
Santa anymore and he maybe

1219
00:50:01,530 --> 00:50:03,040
doesn't have any younger
siblings or something, the

1220
00:50:03,050 --> 00:50:04,430
younger sibling in the house is
different.

1221
00:50:04,590 --> 00:50:07,800
But if they clearly don't, I'll
be very, very, very more than

1222
00:50:07,810 --> 00:50:10,200
happy to let go of the whole.
And just say this is from me.

1223
00:50:10,210 --> 00:50:12,280
Yeah, OK for me, I know.
Well, here's another thing, just

1224
00:50:12,290 --> 00:50:15,020
quickly, just a side note.
When you know when he is a

1225
00:50:15,030 --> 00:50:17,910
proper baby like 2-3, four years
or whatever, and you are wanna

1226
00:50:17,920 --> 00:50:20,290
keep doing that, yeah, are you
gonna be one of those parents

1227
00:50:20,300 --> 00:50:22,630
that every present is from
Santa?

1228
00:50:22,640 --> 00:50:25,100
Yeah, I know, I know.
I've got family who did.

1229
00:50:25,110 --> 00:50:26,790
That what it's like.
I think when I was growing up,

1230
00:50:26,800 --> 00:50:29,180
it was more like most of the
presents were actually from my

1231
00:50:29,190 --> 00:50:31,010
family and it was like one or
two gifts were from Santa as

1232
00:50:31,020 --> 00:50:32,370
well.
Like Santa got you a gift as

1233
00:50:32,380 --> 00:50:33,660
well.
Yeah, that was the kind of

1234
00:50:33,670 --> 00:50:35,340
approach I.
Think there's gotta be, because

1235
00:50:35,350 --> 00:50:37,200
the problem I have, and I've
said this before, I think I said

1236
00:50:37,210 --> 00:50:39,770
this in one of our previous
podcasts about Christmas, is

1237
00:50:39,820 --> 00:50:42,670
it's really weird that Santa has
a list of good and bad children,

1238
00:50:42,880 --> 00:50:45,200
right?
But it's only poor children who

1239
00:50:45,210 --> 00:50:48,930
get bad parents.
You're a bad rich kid.

1240
00:50:48,940 --> 00:50:50,730
You're fine.
You're you're a good poor kid.

1241
00:50:51,180 --> 00:50:53,990
Ohh.
And and the idea I I still don't

1242
00:50:54,000 --> 00:50:55,850
like it.
No matter what situation we're

1243
00:50:55,860 --> 00:50:57,680
in with Rory, whether it's good
or bad.

1244
00:50:57,740 --> 00:51:01,270
I hate the idea of him going
into school and and seeing that

1245
00:51:01,280 --> 00:51:03,950
Santa got a few kids.
PS5, you've got some other kids

1246
00:51:03,960 --> 00:51:06,490
of Rubik's Cube and he got one
kid's hand me down jumper.

1247
00:51:06,560 --> 00:51:07,970
Yeah.
It's like, OK, well that's

1248
00:51:07,980 --> 00:51:08,990
that's horrible.
Isn't it?

1249
00:51:09,000 --> 00:51:10,990
He was the naughtiest.
You're the worst child then,

1250
00:51:11,000 --> 00:51:12,450
therefore.
Exactly, I agree.

1251
00:51:12,520 --> 00:51:15,300
I think what I would like to do
is the gifts are from the people

1252
00:51:15,310 --> 00:51:17,650
who get you the gifts,
especially from outside because

1253
00:51:17,660 --> 00:51:20,430
you only learn gratitude and
stuff like that isn't it is how

1254
00:51:20,440 --> 00:51:22,660
all the shops are filled with
toys for Christmas, but they do,

1255
00:51:22,670 --> 00:51:24,780
They come from the North Pole,
but we just we just have a

1256
00:51:24,790 --> 00:51:26,900
showroom here so the.
North Pole is so stupid.

1257
00:51:26,910 --> 00:51:27,960
What's going on?
Work.

1258
00:51:27,970 --> 00:51:30,280
Out wake up kids.
They're in the they're in

1259
00:51:30,290 --> 00:51:32,180
underneath the stairs.
Go and have a look.

1260
00:51:32,190 --> 00:51:34,700
I reckon revenues already.
She's already she's on it.

1261
00:51:35,130 --> 00:51:37,100
You think we're smart and
already mate, it's not free.

1262
00:51:37,790 --> 00:51:41,590
She did nothing but crying baby.
But yeah, I don't know.

1263
00:51:41,600 --> 00:51:44,190
I think I'll go along with it.
I think it'd be magical.

1264
00:51:44,200 --> 00:51:46,800
I can't wait for him to be
excited by Christmas.

1265
00:51:46,810 --> 00:51:49,630
Yeah, but there is just this
underlying thing in me and it's

1266
00:51:49,640 --> 00:51:50,510
cause I'm cynical.
I know.

1267
00:51:50,520 --> 00:51:52,490
It is the underlying thing of
me.

1268
00:51:52,500 --> 00:51:54,970
I was just like bit weird.
Yeah.

1269
00:51:54,980 --> 00:51:57,790
It's a little bit more so, you
know, like the whole gratitude

1270
00:51:57,800 --> 00:51:58,870
thing I think is quite
important.

1271
00:51:58,880 --> 00:52:02,090
I don't really want to spend
money on my child and be like,

1272
00:52:02,100 --> 00:52:05,070
oh, it's all father.
Christmas you won't care because

1273
00:52:05,080 --> 00:52:06,430
it'll be your.
Kid, it'll be like that.

1274
00:52:06,440 --> 00:52:09,290
Yeah, that that little, that
little, that little electric

1275
00:52:09,300 --> 00:52:12,470
Porsche you're driving around
in, in the house, ��600, that

1276
00:52:12,480 --> 00:52:15,130
love.
All right, where we come from?

1277
00:52:15,700 --> 00:52:17,110
Come from the elf made it?
Yeah.

1278
00:52:17,120 --> 00:52:18,500
No.
I didn't make it, mate.

1279
00:52:18,510 --> 00:52:21,930
Look at my pockets burning.
I'm joking, of course, but the

1280
00:52:21,940 --> 00:52:24,190
gratitude thing is important.
Yeah, I think not to think that

1281
00:52:24,200 --> 00:52:25,610
all these things just free
because I'm good.

1282
00:52:25,900 --> 00:52:28,840
To me, it won't be everything
from Santa.

1283
00:52:29,160 --> 00:52:30,810
For that reason, I think that
would be.

1284
00:52:30,820 --> 00:52:34,150
Like nothing's from Santa.
Does exist?

1285
00:52:34,160 --> 00:52:35,450
Yeah, I'm gonna go along with
it.

1286
00:52:35,520 --> 00:52:39,340
But he hates you.
That's it.

1287
00:52:39,350 --> 00:52:43,930
We thought we solved it.
You You've chucked a few blind

1288
00:52:43,940 --> 00:52:46,800
ranked games with me recently.
Blind blind ranking you've quite

1289
00:52:46,810 --> 00:52:48,130
enjoyed.
I've enjoyed playing it to be

1290
00:52:48,140 --> 00:52:49,680
fair.
So I thought, it's only fair if

1291
00:52:49,690 --> 00:52:51,430
I prep one for.
You I've not looked, by the way,

1292
00:52:51,440 --> 00:52:53,430
because I've known it's.
There, I know I put it on my add

1293
00:52:53,440 --> 00:52:56,650
it to my notes thinking please
don't look so blind race.

1294
00:52:56,660 --> 00:52:59,160
Just anyone not playing.
It's just five things I'm gonna

1295
00:52:59,170 --> 00:53:01,240
give to him, one at a time and
he has to put them in positions

1296
00:53:01,250 --> 00:53:03,900
one to five and they'll be in
order at the end.

1297
00:53:03,910 --> 00:53:05,490
And it might be like a horribly
wrong.

1298
00:53:05,500 --> 00:53:08,300
Who can tell?
So this one's got a bit of A

1299
00:53:08,310 --> 00:53:10,050
twist.
OK, Christmas themed.

1300
00:53:10,450 --> 00:53:13,670
You're gonna you're gonna throw
me under the bus, you're gonna

1301
00:53:13,680 --> 00:53:14,890
blind rank.
OK.

1302
00:53:14,930 --> 00:53:17,390
Your family as guests at
Christmas.

1303
00:53:19,170 --> 00:53:20,780
Yeah, you have you written my
No.

1304
00:53:20,790 --> 00:53:22,180
Not the names, just things I've
written.

1305
00:53:22,190 --> 00:53:23,840
Things like like, like, Grant,
Grandad.

1306
00:53:23,850 --> 00:53:26,150
OK, so we can talk about
stereotypes.

1307
00:53:26,160 --> 00:53:27,410
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
That's.

1308
00:53:27,570 --> 00:53:29,360
Right now specifically.
People, because my family do.

1309
00:53:29,370 --> 00:53:31,380
Listen, I'm not talking about
you.

1310
00:53:31,390 --> 00:53:32,920
He is.
Ian isn't right.

1311
00:53:32,930 --> 00:53:35,100
He's got, he's got a ranking, so
I'm going to give him five

1312
00:53:35,110 --> 00:53:36,540
members of the family.
You might not be in it.

1313
00:53:36,550 --> 00:53:38,660
Sorry.
I could only pick five and he's

1314
00:53:38,670 --> 00:53:39,920
going to make them blind rank.
Them.

1315
00:53:39,930 --> 00:53:41,560
They're stereotype.
People that he liked around

1316
00:53:41,570 --> 00:53:44,240
Christmas.
For Christmas.

1317
00:53:45,880 --> 00:53:48,270
They're all in five, right?
You ready?

1318
00:53:48,340 --> 00:53:51,590
Yeah, OK, I'm doing stereotypes.
Yeah, you look at him, squirming

1319
00:53:51,600 --> 00:53:52,650
already.
He's squirming.

1320
00:53:52,660 --> 00:53:55,460
In case if I put my mum not
first, she won't.

1321
00:53:57,030 --> 00:54:01,710
Christmas.
Comes one the pet dog.

1322
00:54:02,990 --> 00:54:06,980
Yep, Uncle.
Uncle uncles are great to have

1323
00:54:06,990 --> 00:54:08,910
around at Christmas.
My uncles all live far away

1324
00:54:08,920 --> 00:54:10,730
though, so we're talking.
Personally, it's hard because

1325
00:54:10,740 --> 00:54:11,960
they don't.
They don't get to come.

1326
00:54:12,010 --> 00:54:15,740
But uncles, if I'm going to
think objectively here, good

1327
00:54:15,750 --> 00:54:19,510
entertainment, solid guest.
Three.

1328
00:54:19,520 --> 00:54:22,800
Ohh, not that solid though.
Two above you.

1329
00:54:23,630 --> 00:54:25,200
I'm worried.
That's what about that uncle you

1330
00:54:25,210 --> 00:54:28,170
always talk about?
No.

1331
00:54:28,180 --> 00:54:29,290
The one uncle that you like, you
know.

1332
00:54:29,300 --> 00:54:30,160
That one you don't like.
The others.

1333
00:54:30,170 --> 00:54:32,250
That one that you?
Like your family under the bus.

1334
00:54:32,260 --> 00:54:34,570
Yeah, this is my cat.
You all know which ones which?

1335
00:54:34,830 --> 00:54:37,530
Is my name OK, Uncle?
And #3, Fair enough.

1336
00:54:37,540 --> 00:54:39,870
Alright, Nan.
Nan.

1337
00:54:39,940 --> 00:54:43,370
See I can't put Nan below #3,
can I?

1338
00:54:43,420 --> 00:54:45,470
Might do, I don't know.
It depends.

1339
00:54:45,700 --> 00:54:48,380
Because like you know, I love my
nan, but she, you know, come

1340
00:54:48,390 --> 00:54:51,440
around Christmas and then it'll
come 3:00 and the most important

1341
00:54:51,450 --> 00:54:53,170
thing in the world to watch the
queen speech.

1342
00:54:53,340 --> 00:54:56,050
Alright, OK, let's see what she
has to say.

1343
00:54:56,120 --> 00:55:01,290
Ohh, The King's Speech.
A good film.

1344
00:55:01,300 --> 00:55:06,000
What we rank it based on, we
based it on lovely.

1345
00:55:06,010 --> 00:55:07,080
Sentiment right at the end of
the.

1346
00:55:07,090 --> 00:55:08,980
Rank OHH based on Pure
Entertainment.

1347
00:55:09,120 --> 00:55:11,280
It's just like at the end of
this rank, OK?

1348
00:55:11,290 --> 00:55:13,460
One to five, Yeah.
One to be if someone's gonna

1349
00:55:13,470 --> 00:55:15,700
knock on your door.
Christmas Day is #1.

1350
00:55:15,970 --> 00:55:20,100
And it goes down in order.
OK, Christmas.

1351
00:55:20,450 --> 00:55:22,580
So Uncle, he's not afraid.
There's two people that you

1352
00:55:22,590 --> 00:55:26,920
would rather turn up on
Christmas Day and your uncle.

1353
00:55:26,930 --> 00:55:30,700
Ohh, look at 2:00 I've got a two
one man and she's the man being

1354
00:55:30,770 --> 00:55:33,670
used to bring a big old boxer.
Gifts as well, like a big bag

1355
00:55:33,680 --> 00:55:35,700
when they came round.
And that was cool because it was

1356
00:55:35,710 --> 00:55:38,220
like second Christmas We'd have
the morning, then come round the

1357
00:55:38,230 --> 00:55:42,400
second Christmas Nans too.
I'm digging a hole #1 left

1358
00:55:42,410 --> 00:55:44,360
still, but also number 415.
Next one.

1359
00:55:44,370 --> 00:55:46,020
Ready.
Your sister 5.

1360
00:55:52,710 --> 00:55:59,240
I'm joking.
Listen, I am.

1361
00:55:59,310 --> 00:56:01,560
No, but that's easy.
That's easy because I can.

1362
00:56:01,630 --> 00:56:04,140
I would feel less bad because I
could just say to him, I've got

1363
00:56:04,150 --> 00:56:05,820
you five.
I want my level more.

1364
00:56:06,550 --> 00:56:09,210
I can't put Nathan 5 and you
four, can I?

1365
00:56:09,730 --> 00:56:13,560
No, Sister 35.
They'll understand, OK?

1366
00:56:13,570 --> 00:56:15,150
Because they'll come around.
They just.

1367
00:56:15,160 --> 00:56:16,400
They come round to see Rory
anyway.

1368
00:56:16,410 --> 00:56:19,840
Not me.
You did see you all right,

1369
00:56:21,740 --> 00:56:27,790
cousin.
Cousin ohh man ohh God it's 4.

1370
00:56:28,040 --> 00:56:31,960
4/01.
Ohh all my cousins.

1371
00:56:32,050 --> 00:56:32,960
I don't know.
Just, yeah.

1372
00:56:33,030 --> 00:56:34,720
I think.
I think Christmas with my

1373
00:56:34,730 --> 00:56:37,780
cousins would be really fun one.
Number one.

1374
00:56:37,790 --> 00:56:38,840
Yeah.
All right, last one.

1375
00:56:39,540 --> 00:56:43,950
Last one, Mum.
Ohh, she doesn't.

1376
00:56:44,250 --> 00:56:48,930
She she does hope you're.
Listening #4 he'd rather have.

1377
00:56:49,020 --> 00:56:50,970
He'd rather have his uncle and
his nan round than you.

1378
00:56:51,520 --> 00:56:53,050
And my cousin.
And his cousin.

1379
00:56:53,620 --> 00:56:57,930
Sorry about Listen, it's fine
because I spend every Christmas

1380
00:56:57,940 --> 00:57:00,730
with my sister.
I don't spend every Christmas

1381
00:57:00,740 --> 00:57:02,210
with my uncle, my cousin or my
aunt.

1382
00:57:03,080 --> 00:57:05,500
Justifying #4 rather than just
saying it was the last one.

1383
00:57:07,660 --> 00:57:10,900
And now it's free.
Ohh brilliant.

1384
00:57:10,910 --> 00:57:12,440
Brilliant.
So nice and sexist.

1385
00:57:12,450 --> 00:57:14,920
There two men in slots number
one or two.

1386
00:57:14,930 --> 00:57:17,490
No cousin, cousin.
I've got female cousin just

1387
00:57:17,500 --> 00:57:19,470
thank you very much.
And my nans too.

1388
00:57:19,540 --> 00:57:21,950
So that's completely wrong.
The only cousin of yours I know

1389
00:57:21,960 --> 00:57:24,270
of is is your cousin Callum.
Callum.

1390
00:57:24,280 --> 00:57:27,330
Yeah, I think of men.
Anyway, that was good fun.

1391
00:57:27,340 --> 00:57:30,750
Thanks for that.
Stitch me out there and the

1392
00:57:30,760 --> 00:57:32,490
people listen to.
I think that's inverted on

1393
00:57:32,500 --> 00:57:33,630
people.
Listen to the podcast.

1394
00:57:34,100 --> 00:57:35,450
Is that my sister?
My mum?

1395
00:57:35,940 --> 00:57:38,240
Hey, hello.
Can't wait for Christmas with

1396
00:57:38,250 --> 00:57:41,240
you guys.
Three releases after Christmas

1397
00:57:41,250 --> 00:57:43,620
now.
He's just going to turn up on

1398
00:57:43,630 --> 00:57:46,000
Christmas and not talk to me.
What's up?

1399
00:57:46,510 --> 00:57:48,010
Ohh no.
I'm probably the last person you

1400
00:57:48,020 --> 00:57:51,200
wanna speak to Dylan, so give me
a child and bugger.

1401
00:57:51,210 --> 00:57:53,090
Oh gosh, I wish I did apply for
you now.

1402
00:57:53,140 --> 00:57:54,170
No, that was funny.
That was.

1403
00:57:54,180 --> 00:57:54,750
Funny.
Well done.

1404
00:57:54,760 --> 00:57:56,210
What would be your order then?
Knowing.

1405
00:57:56,860 --> 00:58:00,000
Knowing, Knowing what?
Knowing the five, you're gonna

1406
00:58:00,010 --> 00:58:00,380
blind.
Right.

1407
00:58:00,390 --> 00:58:00,890
No.
Hell no.

1408
00:58:00,900 --> 00:58:02,890
I'm not ranking them.
That's like that's like family

1409
00:58:02,900 --> 00:58:04,170
suicide.
Don't know what you're up to,

1410
00:58:04,180 --> 00:58:06,370
mate.
Stupid thing to to agree.

1411
00:58:06,380 --> 00:58:10,230
To you've done me in there.
Anyway, right, let's get into an

1412
00:58:10,240 --> 00:58:11,450
hour.
Should we finish up?

1413
00:58:11,460 --> 00:58:13,450
I did one thing if I can finish
up.

1414
00:58:13,540 --> 00:58:14,800
Unless you want to say something
else.

1415
00:58:16,220 --> 00:58:18,140
Fine.
I'm reeling from the blind rack.

1416
00:58:19,940 --> 00:58:21,600
I think it's been.
What I will say is I think it's

1417
00:58:21,610 --> 00:58:25,070
been a very opinionated podcast,
so we want to hear your opinions

1418
00:58:25,080 --> 00:58:27,650
on anything we said.
Please rip into me if I've been

1419
00:58:27,660 --> 00:58:29,260
quite opinionated today.
I feel like you've really

1420
00:58:29,270 --> 00:58:30,580
grilled me.
Yeah, Yeah.

1421
00:58:31,140 --> 00:58:34,880
And I think the other thing was,
we're releasing this on Friday

1422
00:58:34,890 --> 00:58:37,220
the 22nd.
So a few days till Christmas.

1423
00:58:37,230 --> 00:58:40,270
Yes, If you're listening before
Christmas or on Christmas Day,

1424
00:58:40,340 --> 00:58:43,290
Merry Christmas.
Jokes aside, you guys, you keep

1425
00:58:43,300 --> 00:58:44,920
coming back for this and it's
been a really good year.

1426
00:58:44,930 --> 00:58:46,430
We're coming up to a year now.
Yeah.

1427
00:58:46,600 --> 00:58:50,200
We'll do a New Year's podcast as
well, where I think we'll set

1428
00:58:50,210 --> 00:58:52,250
some goals 2020.
Four, we're gonna do it live

1429
00:58:52,260 --> 00:58:57,560
stream. 11:00 PM on the going to
bring in 12:00 PM together.

1430
00:58:57,650 --> 00:58:58,800
It will make everyone would want
to.

1431
00:58:58,810 --> 00:59:00,020
Join, of course.
Yeah, yeah.

1432
00:59:00,030 --> 00:59:02,040
In fact, you know what?
I'm I'm specifically going to

1433
00:59:02,050 --> 00:59:05,760
only look at analytics from the
25th December because those are

1434
00:59:05,770 --> 00:59:06,960
the real G's.
Yeah, OK.

1435
00:59:07,010 --> 00:59:09,240
If anyone sends, I've got to
make something up.

1436
00:59:09,250 --> 00:59:12,500
Now if anyone sends us a screen
shot listening to this podcast

1437
00:59:12,510 --> 00:59:15,370
and the date is the 25th of
December, we'll enter you into a

1438
00:59:15,380 --> 00:59:18,500
draw.
Really is making this up put.

1439
00:59:18,510 --> 00:59:26,400
Into into a drawer and you will
win a T-shirt that we've

1440
00:59:26,410 --> 00:59:29,870
designed.
Yes, and to Santa hats, because

1441
00:59:29,880 --> 00:59:32,980
Hayden bought 4, but he bought 2
Figueroa on their own.

1442
00:59:32,990 --> 00:59:35,920
There were packs of two.
Alright, OK, we'll make a good

1443
00:59:35,930 --> 00:59:37,350
T-shirt out.
If this is real, we'll make a

1444
00:59:37,360 --> 00:59:38,680
good.
Teacher OK, here we go.

1445
00:59:38,830 --> 00:59:41,620
OK, let's do a competition.
We'll actually say the actual

1446
00:59:41,630 --> 00:59:44,760
things on Instagram.
OK, if you send us a screenshot

1447
00:59:44,770 --> 00:59:49,040
of you listening to this episode
between now and New Year, we'll

1448
00:59:49,050 --> 00:59:51,040
put you into a draw.
Not Christmas Day anymore.

1449
00:59:51,560 --> 00:59:53,550
There's only a few.
Days you get 2 entries if it's.

1450
00:59:53,560 --> 00:59:55,140
Christmas Day.
Yeah, it's Christmas Day.

1451
00:59:55,150 --> 01:00:00,200
You get 5 entries.
Listen, whenever he makes the

1452
01:00:00,210 --> 01:00:02,050
suggestion, I have to go back
and just alter it slightly so

1453
01:00:02,060 --> 01:00:03,190
it's like my.
Suggestion.

1454
01:00:03,740 --> 01:00:06,240
You get a bonus entry if it's
Christmas Day, but between now

1455
01:00:06,250 --> 01:00:09,370
and Christmas we'll put you into
a drawer and you will win a

1456
01:00:09,420 --> 01:00:12,040
teach seat with Peach shirt.
Done.

1457
01:00:12,090 --> 01:00:13,300
Yeah.
Can you take me seriously when

1458
01:00:13,310 --> 01:00:15,350
I'm pointing at you with this?
Look if you're.

1459
01:00:15,360 --> 01:00:16,680
Looking quite phallic, doesn't
it?

1460
01:00:16,690 --> 01:00:18,710
Look at that.
It's got a rib at the bottom as

1461
01:00:18,720 --> 01:00:21,100
well, honest to God.
Right.

1462
01:00:21,110 --> 01:00:23,220
Mr For your pleasure.
Let's move on.

1463
01:00:24,030 --> 01:00:25,850
I'm gonna finish up this
podcast.

1464
01:00:25,860 --> 01:00:28,840
Thank you for joining us with a
little poem.

1465
01:00:29,300 --> 01:00:30,700
You know yourself.
No I didn't.

1466
01:00:30,990 --> 01:00:33,020
I thought you'd like this
because I just thought be funny

1467
01:00:33,030 --> 01:00:34,860
I got was the night before
Christmas.

1468
01:00:35,210 --> 01:00:38,980
I thought I wonder what I will
do if I ask it.

1469
01:00:38,990 --> 01:00:42,200
So I did ChatGPT and I chucked
it in, and I asked that GPT to

1470
01:00:42,210 --> 01:00:44,780
rewrite towards night before
Christmas through the lens of a

1471
01:00:44,790 --> 01:00:47,120
knackered teacher.
That's what I did, and I thought

1472
01:00:47,130 --> 01:00:49,300
it's either gonna be absolutely
terrible or or kind of get the

1473
01:00:49,310 --> 01:00:50,560
idea.
And I thought it was alright, so

1474
01:00:50,570 --> 01:00:53,770
I'm gonna read it to you, OK?
Alright, towards the week before

1475
01:00:53,780 --> 01:00:55,950
break, and all through the
school's not.

1476
01:00:55,960 --> 01:00:59,170
A teacher was resting.
They all felt like fools, That

1477
01:00:59,180 --> 01:01:02,350
lesson plans hung by the desk
with despair in hopes that

1478
01:01:02,360 --> 01:01:04,530
create creativity soon would be
there.

1479
01:01:05,400 --> 01:01:08,090
The students were restless, all
snug in their seats, while

1480
01:01:08,100 --> 01:01:11,490
visions of chaos danced in their
tweets and admins in their

1481
01:01:11,500 --> 01:01:13,670
offices.
And I, with my stress, had just

1482
01:01:13,680 --> 01:01:17,030
settled down for a long winter's
mess went out in the hallway.

1483
01:01:17,040 --> 01:01:20,110
There arose such a clatter.
I sprang from my desk to see

1484
01:01:20,120 --> 01:01:23,030
what was the matter.
Away to the window I flew like a

1485
01:01:23,040 --> 01:01:26,040
flash, tore open the blinds and
threw up the sash.

1486
01:01:26,170 --> 01:01:28,960
The flickering lights and the
doll worn out tiles gave a

1487
01:01:28,970 --> 01:01:34,060
gloomy ambiance to teacherly
trials when to what my bloodshot

1488
01:01:34,070 --> 01:01:37,580
eyes should appear but a minute
just slay and eight tiny

1489
01:01:37,590 --> 01:01:41,520
reindeer with an old little
driver, so lively and quick I

1490
01:01:41,530 --> 01:01:43,860
knew in a moment it must be St
Mick.

1491
01:01:44,050 --> 01:01:46,390
I don't know why it did that
bit, why it changed.

1492
01:01:46,400 --> 01:01:50,260
That more rapid than Eagles, his
coursers, they his courses.

1493
01:01:50,270 --> 01:01:54,020
They came and he whistled and
shouted and called them by name.

1494
01:01:54,740 --> 01:01:59,930
Now dash it now Slump It now
lacks A dascal and vexed on

1495
01:01:59,940 --> 01:02:01,910
languid, on lethargic, on
dullard.

1496
01:02:01,920 --> 01:02:04,270
And next.
I don't know what he likes the

1497
01:02:04,280 --> 01:02:05,500
days.
Of course, like the days are.

1498
01:02:05,510 --> 01:02:06,650
There we go.
I couldn't read that.

1499
01:02:07,560 --> 01:02:09,370
And now dash away, dash away,
dash away.

1500
01:02:09,380 --> 01:02:13,170
All as dry leaves that before
the wild hurricane fly when they

1501
01:02:13,180 --> 01:02:15,030
meet with an obstacle mount to
the sky.

1502
01:02:15,120 --> 01:02:17,890
So up to the ceiling the courses
they flew with the save the

1503
01:02:17,900 --> 01:02:21,370
Slave full of lesson plans and
St Mick too.

1504
01:02:21,800 --> 01:02:23,710
I'm going to leave it there
because it gets nonsense from

1505
01:02:23,720 --> 01:02:25,010
here.
So that is what?

1506
01:02:25,020 --> 01:02:28,320
Happens nonsense.
The complete nonsense.

1507
01:02:29,870 --> 01:02:33,260
Why they changed it to say Mick,
what am I don't know.

1508
01:02:33,270 --> 01:02:35,780
I love the reindeer name like
it's like tiredness, isn't it?

1509
01:02:35,790 --> 01:02:36,860
Yeah.
I know.

1510
01:02:36,870 --> 01:02:39,000
Yeah, it's really good.
I was quite impressive, I

1511
01:02:39,010 --> 01:02:39,960
thought it.
Was good.

1512
01:02:39,970 --> 01:02:42,160
Ohh, gosh, that's a great.
Well, we can't stop that.

1513
01:02:42,230 --> 01:02:44,090
We gotta finish there and we
will leave it there.

1514
01:02:44,130 --> 01:02:46,480
Guys, Merry Christmas.
Thank you so much for listening.

1515
01:02:46,490 --> 01:02:49,380
You are the only gift we need.
And a few 100,000.

1516
01:02:49,390 --> 01:02:50,720
Pounds as well.
And our children.

1517
01:02:50,790 --> 01:02:52,920
See you later guys.
Love you all.

1518
01:02:52,930 --> 01:02:53,920
Merry Christmas.