Ep 160: Christmas Q&A Special! Gifts, Off Timetable & Unhinged Christmas Behaviour!

0:00 Hello everyone, welcome back to another episode of Teach Sleep. Roho Pete, My name is Dylan. My name is Dylan. What was that? Roho, Pete. Roho, Pete. It's the C word special, baby. Oh God, here we go. What's the C word? You know C word. There's the only C word we use in school. There's only C word I use a lot and that. No Christmas. Why did you beat that? I said Christmas. Did you? Yes. Yeah, obviously that you could tell. Yeah, you said Christmas. The length of the watch is. Why I've covered your face, beat it fully because you Dylan said Christmas. This is a Christmas special. Exactly right. One of many.

0:41 I can't. One of quite a few that we've bulk recorded for your pleasure over this festive period, but this is our Christmas theme Q&A. Look, an amazing person in the WhatsApp community actually suggested this. Yeah, they did. And before we jump into the WhatsApp community where you can, you know, submit your questions and things and we've got loads of questions for this Christmas Q&A, I've got a little treat for you, Dylan. I brought something along today because I felt like it's not really a Christmas special, is it? Unless. Is this what I saw? Yeah. Yeah, this is what I had in my hand on the way in. Rolled up. Yeah, unless we wear Christmas hats. I know. No, I know why you've done. This. Yeah, you. I was going to say, you know, there's something out in here. I'll give you one chunky one. There's if you're watching this podcast. There's a reason I bought Christmas hats and it isn't actually for the Christmas spirit. It's because we want to watch Dylan, but I'm going to put mine on.

1:24 Look, buddy, nice and easy. Look at all this space here. Look how look how that looks like a Christmas hat, doesn't it? It's sort of like oi, loose all around and it flops over. I thought we'd give the massive slab head a Christmas hat as well because Dylan's got an enormous head. It's a running joke that he has such enormous. It's not a joke, it's just like, it's just what I. Have not for you it's a joke for everybody else a joke and we just like giving right Dylan things but. If these if these are the ones I remember, this does actually get onto my head. Does it but all flomp? Dissipates. OK, let's see. Because it isn't XL. Is it XL? It's XL. We bought XL because we had you in mind. I'm off the charts mate. When Rory was born he was in the 100th percentile. He he didn't he he percentile didn't exist on the graph. The poor kid.

2:06 For his head size to be clear. Here we go. Oh, it goes on. That's a. It's a stretch. Aren't they meant to be like floppy? It's a stretch. Look at that Dome it. It is like tight up until looks. Like a swimming hat swimming out with a little bit. Of loose stuff on the I'm swimming to the north. Pole So yeah, everyone looking at me, if you look at me for a second, see this, this is like sag. This is. Actually, Imperial, if I turn to the side, if you're watching, look at that. That is unbelievable. Oh, God. Oh my God. Doesn't look right, does it? No, not at all. It does. Fit though like you have actually got it on. Define fit if. If getting it on means it fits, yeah, then OK. It's like people that wear jeans that are far, far too skinny and they're like pulling them up their legs. Like it's like, come on, mate.

2:48 They're they're just. Normal jeans, do you? Aren't they? All right, So we I'm going to wear this for one question and one question, OK, should do the first one. Come on. Right, this is this is from regular sized Tim. I have a feeling people were taking the Mick with the names. Sorry, I only want questions from Tiny Tim. Sorry it's as regular sized Tim so I have to take it. Elf on the shelf. Good in classroom or massive distraction? I don't. I don't think it has. I think it can work. All right, that's what I'll say first before I go into this whole deep thing where, OK, everyone will think I'm Scrooge Mcduck. In fact, the Christmas that's coming off sod Elf on the Shelf. Scrooge Mcduck. It's messed up, yeah. It's all right, it's all good heads mess anyway. Elf on the Shelf I don't like it and there's loads of reasons why people don't like.

3:39 It go on, let's all hear moaning, moaning. Oh, I don't like the kids having no. Heaven forbid we have a bit of fudge skull. It's not fun for me to set up a flower gone Everywhere display thing in the middle of my classroom and every morning. That's not my idea of fun. However, the kids might find it really fun. It might be very enjoyable for the children they might like. It doesn't have to be a distraction, but it could be a distraction. There's a lot of reasons why you would not want to not do it. I don't think you can sit here and say it's this because I've seen loads of teachers do it really well, very creatively. They enjoy it, the kids enjoy it. It makes no impact on their day other than positive. So I'm not going to sit here and say it's rubbish. However, the whole thing of the elf, I actually don't want Rory getting into Elf on the Shelf because it's just this idea of this really annoying naughty elf who we all love.

4:26 Like in a school. You can kind of see how that's problematic, you know, like if someone's does something the elf did later on, you're like, excuse me, don't do that. Yeah. Oh, the elf did it this morning, Miss and and you thought it was really funny. OK, and then you have to try and explain that. So funny. Well, I'll be sending back his Dennis the Menace DVDs I got on for Christmas then. God forbid we have any characters that do naughty things that you can learn from. No, we're not learning from it if we celebrate it. Secondly, why did you go to Dennis the Menace and why is it on DVD? Are you still stuck 25 years ago? I'll be, I'll be getting the old, the old album, The Chipmunks on VHS. I'll be sending that.

5:07 Back, God forbid, that new show Dennis the Menace. Please do send back any DVD you bought him because I have nothing to play a DVD on. Oh. God, yeah, I don't know. I don't know why I went there because I don't watch DVDs either, so I'm sure sure I'm trying to be clever. And what's? Going on Elf on the Shelf. Clever and funny. Clever and funny, not your Forte, I think. I think Elf on the Shelf. Harmless fun. Great fun for the kids. Yeah. Anyone that disagrees with that. Complete Scrooge. Complete Scrooge. Now, I, I in all I'm. I'm probably the same boat. If it can be a bit of fun, you don't. It doesn't have to be. I think you do it a couple of times. A couple of times. I I only did it I say did it. This is very much an inverted comments here. When my year group partner did it and we did it for the whole year group in the shared area, that's what she did it every morning. I didn't do it though.

5:52 I'm not going to say I did it. I bet you're here going Yeah, I did it. You did nothing. I definitely definitely put the elf up at least once. At least once, at least once somewhere. Our TA's were well into it so they were always doing hilarious things. That's. Why? I don't mind. I don't mind it. This is where I don't want to be the person who's like, you're awful if you do it. No, you're not. Tell you what spoiled it? We didn't do it ever again. We had because we did it well as a year 6 teacher and we did it a couple years in a row when we had the child in the year group whose mum came in and said I'm sorry but they are just terrified of else. Oh. Yeah, and I was, and we were like, oh, we can't really do Alf on the shelf then, can we? I guess we have to do snake and a bake. Just snakes everyone. Oh, I. Guess we have to do Dennis the Menace on DVD on TV every single morning. Let's watch him. I love how instead of trying to think of some kind of witty new rhyme, you just went back to the awful joke you made earlier.

6:34 It's not awful. Is it awful when I can hear the laughter from the audience? Next question Next question. How much is it acceptable to spend on gifts for class? Do you have any tales of colleagues taking it too far? I think about nothing is the right man OK, roughly 0. Pound I'm Scrooge again. I'm I'm sensing a theme. I'm not wearing a hat. I said, in all honesty, I don't even know. Like surely it's just you just got to agree with your colleagues, right? So you don't make anyone feel silly. Well this is a good talking point. Now do you think you should pre agree with your colleagues? Because I've, I've had it before in previous schools where I know of a teacher who goes over the top crazy with gifts for the kids. And it's obviously really nice for the kids. But if you're in like a four form entry school, yeah. And 1 teacher is buying all the kids like an Easter egg at Easter.

7:24 Yeah. Or like this unbelievable slime kit at Christmas for the kid and then they walk out and the other three classes don't have anything. Yeah. Is that OK? Is that just real life? Get over it. You, you, you go kids. Some people get stuff, some people don't. Or is it in a school? Something you should control. I think that I think in a school, I'm sure there is an element to say, Oh yeah, it's real life, It's what happens. But this isn't real life. It's not real life though, is it? It's a, it's an unbelievably controlled environment. It's like the complete opposite of life. It's school. We should be getting ready for real life. Why? Why they're say? Eventually, yeah. They're say eventually it's OK. Yeah, yeah, no, I think in that situation it does just kind of make the other teachers look a bit rubbish and just it could, I think there should be some discussion. You know, I think there should be some. I don't think it has to be everyone's going to spend £4.72, OK.

8:10 But I think we should let they should let's go discussion. Role play, Let's go. OK, ready. Discussion time. I'm walking in. I'm the teacher. Hey guys, just letting you know, I know it's a bit rude if I didn't, so I'm just going to come in and say I've bought all my kids Dennis and Menace on DVD, about £10 per box set. But it's just something I wanted to do for him. I hope that's OK if you all. I think we should probably have a discussion about this before next. Time. We're discussing it now. Yeah, I get, I get that you've done it already, but obviously it doesn't make us. No, it's fine. I could take the Mac if I wanted to, but it's the discussion whether I bought them or not is that I'm doing it. Yeah, OK. Well, there's not really a discussion that you're just telling us you're doing something. It does make us look a little bit bad because I've bought my kids. Well, you are some chocolate coins. Yeah, great. That's not really comparable to a a box set of. DVDs. I'm a box set DVDs then.

8:51 Well, no, because that's a lot of money, isn't? It Yeah, there's a lot of money I spent here, mate, I know yeah, I've got a boy already I. Appreciate it. It's a lovely, it's a lovely thing for you to do, but you should have thought first because now by comparison, that the kids in our class, it's going to look bad. What? Would have happened if I talked to you first? What? We would have discussed and maybe come to a conclusion of not spending £10 per child. So you you're just annoyed that the discussion didn't end and how you wanted it to end? Well, I wasn't going to change my mind it. Didn't and how we all wanted it to end after you. Well, that's fine. So I'm going to carry on doing it. OK? What are you going to do about it? Well, nothing. It just makes us bad. And then I'll just send out a newsletter to the parents. And passively, aggressively, passively, aggressively about about Lia. You really? OK, cool, I'm going to do it anyway. Though, OK, well enjoy that. I don't even like Dennis Menace mate. It's 2025, no one's going to like it anyway, you idiot. No, my point that the overall point I was trying to make there by the by, was you can have all the discussions you want. Sometimes people just do it, yeah. Yeah, of course.

9:42 And you can just call them a Dick. This is all right. Oh, now it was the Scrooge. Not Scrooge. I love how in your head you've made-up the line of chocolate coins. Is is fine? Yeah, someone else who's like tapping you in the shoulder going. Excuse me? Didn't talk about that. Sorry. Didn't mention you're getting your. I won't get my class. Nothing. No no no no. The chocolate coins was I was pre discussed with the rest of the team. You weren't there you weren't there. This is this is an 8 form entry and the seven of us actually took it upon ourselves to get together you. Turn up. Excuse me. Sorry, Why did you not involve me in that chat then? We didn't, you just didn't turn up. It was it was a it was a voluntary meeting at 6:00 PM. I was at big DVD. Yeah, exactly. New sale, I've got a pop to the shops or something. HMV.

10:23 Doesn't in the universe where I mind Dennis the Menace DVDs, I thought HMV was quite a suitable place to go, but it. Doesn't make sense. She kept in. It does. Also exist. It came out of administration was saved and there are some shops. HMV Just a little bit of a Fact Check there because this guy doesn't know what he's talking. About no one cares, right? Moving on to the next question. This is from a net curtain, I have to say. I have to say, when we were having a quick flick through these questions and getting ready on our iPads earlier on, Dylan was like, Oh yeah, there's some funny names but they're not all funny. And use this one as the example of, see this one's from Annette as a real person. I said read it again, Dylan. And he went and I didn't realise it's an Annette curtain. Oh, right, just pause for one second. Yeah, how funny would it be if it is a real person? I mean, it is I am so.

11:07 Sorry, she was a real woman. Mrs Curtin, I am so sorry. Or miss. Don't miss. Almost. Yeah, almost. You shouldn't. You shouldn't presume. Presume. Never presume. Off you go. When is it appropriate to decorate the classroom? Oh God, here we go. I. Think in a secular society, all religions shouldn't be outside of the state school system. Hang on, colleague, this year did it on November 10th, right. That's flipped me a little bit. That's wild. Yeah, a little bit, because I was about to take the Mick out of you. Probably been like, oh, actually everyone's never dagger in a classroom. It's extra workload. I don't even gonna do the displays in my room. The only thing I heard of that was workload and displays the most of it I don't.

11:50 Know that's it then isn't. It you sound like Pingu. Pingu, bringing back all the childhood. I remember Pingu, it was on last night after Dennis the Dennis. And the reason it was on after this because I control it with my DVD player exactly 1 in one out. Which I bought from HMV. OK, So what do you actually think about that? Because there are two questions there actually. Do you know what, when is it appropriate to decorate a classroom and what do you think about the colleague that did it on November 10th? So. I think, I actually think it's similar to when it's acceptable to decorate your home. And I think December's a really good line. Yeah, I think December is a fantastic line. I think there are some situations, for example, this year I think Sunday was like the 30th of November, OK, So like it was like, so obviously if you're doing it at the weekend, I see why people did it at the end of November for the weekend because then whole of December you have a tree up or whatever.

12:38 So I think that's OK. I would say personally if it's the month of December, you can see Christmas stuff, decorations. That's that's my line. Yeah, I couldn't agree more strongly. If I'm open in my advent calendar, I'm eating a chocolate on December 1st. Yeah, there's not Christmas decorations around me, right? Sad isn't. It that's a really good point. Sad. Although do you only eat 1 advent calendar when you when you get? I don't believe for a second an advent calendar lasts more than a week at your house at any point. Do you know what? I've grown up. The last few years I've grown up. You've grown up in the same sentence. You say you still have an advent calendar. Yeah, I've grown up. I've grown up, guys. I use my advent calendar like a child. Wait, wait, wait, wait. Do you know who buys my advent calendar as? Well, your mum my. Mum, she loves it.

13:19 She's like that's a ritual every year. She's like everyone advent calendar. She gets her parents advent calendar, she gets us advent calendar and. It's nice and no one gets her one. What pathetic man you are. I definitely do. Years and years and years. Your mum buying everyone else an advent calendar And what do you do? Gobble, gobble, gobble. Where's more mum? More, more. Pathetic. Yeah. No one ever thinks about your mum, do they? Well, do you know what, Sonora? I'm buying you an advent calendar. OK, I'm going to get bring it to you and I'll be the son you deserve. Everyone's thinking, oh he's made-up another name, my mum. You've forgotten how crazy my mum's name is as you dropped it in. Have we told the story in the podcast? Probably a long time ago. So I can already tell it again told me to tell it because. I yeah, you tell you tell the story of my mum. Hayden's mum was in the womb, she wasn't born yet.

14:01 When Hayden's grandparents were walking around to school, I think. Hey, were they walking around to school for your one of your mum's siblings? In all honesty, I have no idea they're. Walking around to school for some reason and they went past the coat pegs in this school and obviously all the coat pegs are named and labelled. And they were thinking, what can we call our daughter? What, what name could we have? And that was in the back of their head. So walking through the school and they were looking at all the name tags going, oh, that's a nice name. That's lovely. Oh, and both of them saw this name exotic on this name tag report. That's a name. I've never Sonora. I've never seen the name Sonora before. Isn't Sonora Cornea? That's quite unique. Maybe we should personally. Yeah. OK. Kept in their brain. Obviously. Some baby Sonora kinda came out and they called her Sonora. Fantastic.

14:42 Turns out they just misread the word Sandra. They misread the D as a no if. You think it's close though if you just get rid of the top. If you just. Completely change the letter. It's really. Bad. They're rid of the ascender on the D. They find it, said Sonora. They said, Sandra, and this is an example of how handwriting is really important. Really important and why in my mum is now the the only person called Sonora in the UK. That's right. Hey on. Don't worry about it mate. Literally so funny, isn't it? People are like, Oh yeah, that's really cool. Like where, you know, what's the background? Where should come from? No, just misread AD. Yeah, just just misread name. Yeah, yeah. Nothing particularly interesting there really heritage wise. November the 10th is a war crime suitable to go and try on The Hague. Yep. Cool on that one. Nothing more to say about it.

15:22 That colleague just I'd shunned them for the rest of this year and next year probably. I I would make get them fired. Yeah, finally. Whistle blow. If you get a few of your colleagues together, make up something. But when this is important, when you're making up something to go and whistle blow on someone else to get rid of them, you have to make sure your stories are like 70% similar because if they're exactly the same, they'll know you've made it up. So you have to make sure when you're recounting it, there's a little bit of change, like put a bit of spicy, like someone's wearing a blue jumper, someone else's wearing a red jumper. Just make sure it's like like like realistic. Yeah, yeah, definitely. You've done this before, haven't? You. Well, how do you think you got fired? Yeah, I was. Gonna say I'm starting to question. Who guitar baby? See you later. You're the one that told the head teacher I'd committed murder in the car park. Right.

16:07 How did you know? Damn it. Right. Next question from Catherine. We always know when there's a cut because you do a really over the top right. Is it really trying to sound natural and you're like Lady lad, let's carry on from where we started. I'm a bit annoyed actually because when I put cuts in, yeah, I make them so seamless no one would ever know. No one would ever know. You've just, you've just brought it to their attention. Now they'll they'll start. Seeing no one would ever know yeah wrecked Oh no one would ever know that's. Exactly how I said it before all week up. You're you're an idiot. You ruined this podcast from Catherine. What is your favourite Christmas song for the children to sing in a performance? Oh that's cute. I saw a video I'm TikTok of someone doing hot to go by chaperone.

16:51 God's sake it was on the stage. It was a group of teachers. I think Noah's just taken him right OK. And it was 1 teacher. I can't remember who it was. Who, who's that? They're going. I hope they do. Hot to go. And then the teacher next ground. This is a child's nativity play just to the stage. And there's free teachers doing HOTTI love it. I love it when schools just have those two teachers are just a bit unhinged and they just do rounds like it doesn't happen. Are you talking about ourselves? Yeah, Yeah. We would never do things like that. You were singing Feliz Navidad the other day. Brilliant. But you sung more than the words, Feliz Navidad. And I was like, no one, no one knows more than the words. I know this, Navidad. No one knows more than that. You jumped on that. And I. Know more of the words after I know it because we taught our kids to sing it.

17:35 Sing it now. OK, ready. I'm just got to go from Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad, Feliz Navidad Prospero annoy Felizi Dad, I want to wish you a Merry Christmas. Brilliant. And it goes on and on because we taught our kids. That is actually probably my favourite song I've taught the kids because they're so engaged. The fact it's not in English and the fact they can learn how to do it. And our school did Spanish as well. And it just means I want to wish you a Merry Christmas and a happy New Year. Do you know what he says in English after that's just a translation That's what he says for brilliant and it's actually one of my favourite Christmas songs in general. Is it? Yeah Someone else asks what's your favourite Christmas song?

18:16 So I guess this is a 2 prong question we can have here which is OK back over to you cuz Feliz Navidad is my favourite. I love all the classics right and I think the darkness do Merry Christmas. I love that song. I really like that one and another. I'm trying to do ones that most people don't say. I actually read that one from Elton John and Ed Sheeran. Merry Christmas. Yes, cool. Merry Christmas. Yeah, we might get copyright striked. Oh yeah, you have to do it in less than 5 seconds. Yeah, yeah, cool. Because it sounds so real thing that will get flagged. Those AI bots will be picking them up. And is that Ed Sheeran and bloody just to say, Tom Jones?

18:58 If we go back to the absolute, like classic, like old Christmas songs, yeah. Do you have, you know, it's just like the traditional ones laid? Ohh, like like actual like. We wish you a Merry Christmas. Ohh like like. Carols, Yeah. Do you have? Is there any of them of them you like? Jingle Bells at the minute, right? Because Roy's obsessed with it and we were driving the other night to the Christmas lights with what you guys went as well. And for the entire 1st 40 minutes of the journey, unless Jingle Bells was playing or some kind of version of Jingle Bells, he was sat in the back going Jingle Bells, Jingle Bells, so annoying Jingle Bells. So we put Jingle Bells on my way. It's a good song to you. Jingle Bell Rock underrated as well. I love that whenever it comes on, I'm always rocking.

19:39 I taught the kids that one as well. I'm one of my first years and we had actions to it and everything and the kids loved it. Did you? That's a good one. Love that. Yeah. So yeah, loads of good Christmas songs. Jingle all the way, Jingle all the way. Yeah, that's the best one. Whole time by Rory. The next question was basically we've answered it. It's from Tom and he said what's the best ever Christmas song? So we just, I, I put that in there, mate. Yeah. What is your best ever Christmas song? Go on. Because I said it was the Merry Christmas one. I think I want, I want from you now. Actual ones that are in the charts. I like all the classics. Like there's not many Christmas songs I don't actually like. The Queen 1. Go on, what's it? What's it called? I don't know the Queen, the Queen song. I don't know the Queen Christmas. The Queen Christmas song. Look it up. That one. You know what I mean? That's. Called Bohemian Rhapsody. Yeah, that's a good one.

20:21 That one because I love Queen. OK, on this theme then, what's the next question? What's the greatest Christmas film of all time? All my days The Grinch comes to mind. I really I the first one. Yeah. I really do love that film. But with Jim Carrey, Yeah, yeah, 10 out of. 10, like the first, yeah, that just came straight to mind. So I'm going to go my gut because the Grinch just made me laugh. I remember watching it the first time and I thought it was the funniest thing I've ever seen in my life when I was kid. It's not that funny now, but you know, it's a good film, yeah. Jim Carrey won on the generational run the night he's been like what? He made so many. Good. Unbelievable. Yeah, Grinch is good. I like there's one on Netflix called Klaus. Relatively new again. Is it Klaus?

21:02 No, it's called Klaus. OK, K, it's K and. It's like, hang on a minute. It's Klaus. It's a bloke. That's his name. I'm not saying that it's like and it's, it's really, really, really, really good. Like it's like an animated. One, is it fairly new? Yeah, yeah, fairly new. Like I I say like 2 years, it's probably like 5-6. Years at this point, yeah. But it's on, it's on Netflix, it's really good and I like Arthur Christmas classic love. Arthur Christmas, that's a good one. There is another classic. I feel like everyone like no one disagrees with this Home alone. Home alone. It's just like you just, you just watch it. It's just a ritual at this point, isn't it? You just. Watch it. Huge safeguarding issues should get social services. From Yeah, yeah. Yeah, you don't get on a plane without knowing where your child. Is yeah, yeah, yeah. So. That's a shame, terrible, real shame. Anyway, next question, what's your go to Christmas party game?

21:45 And a lot of people ask us about this, What are your top tier versions? What do you do? Firstly, can we just like Christmas parties in general? With the kids, yeah. I absolutely love them. I know. We'll dive into more detail in our next episode about Christmas in school in general. So asking this question and when you're in that situation with the parties and the kids are loving it, what what are your go to games? Yeah, my favourite 1 is something that gets them moving around because they're always hyper as anything. We with a simple game you probably play loads as well. Is it the corner game? It's the corner. Game with the dice. I love it because the kids are so into it every single year. So if anyone doesn't know what this game, it's the ritual of our schools. It's normal. But I think, I think it's a lot of schools play this game. I imagine it is, but you never know of Christmas parties.

22:25 I'm like, there's probably so many variations of Christmas parties and there's some wild things out there in, in a nutshell, you're a dice. You can a big dice one, those big phone ones, put 6 pictures on it, whatever you want to do to reference 6 locations around the hole that you're in. And we just tried to do the four corners and two other places. And it's as simple as this. The kids run and stand next to one of those six places. We roll the dice if it lands on them that that everyone that's standing there is out. Simple as that. And it's just like you just keep doing until the only few people left And you can mix it up. Like when it gets, when it gets goes on forever, I just switch around and say whichever one the dice lands on is the only one that's still in. The other five are out. And that's how you sort of end the game. Essentially gambling from a young age, gambling hooked on that risk reward. And what I love is you were saying about how it's really important to get the kids moving when you play two or three games in a row and the same kids out straight away and just sits in the middle.

23:13 Yeah, sits in the middle for 20 minutes. Very unlucky, really gets them moving. Really fantastic game. Yeah, Wow. You know, can't win. I like musical statues. Musical statues. Classic, classic musical, statues, game, dancing, anything like you said, where you can play music and they think it's like a disco type game or something. It's just unbelievable. You want to tie them out. Is there a least favourite? Is there a game you've played and you think they never love this? Because I've got one in mind. I always think they love this, and they never seem to. Which is past the puzzle. Yeah, because it's boring. I always think that's a classic game and then they play it and they absolutely hate it. Yeah, if you've got like at least 33 kids with one parcel, imagine you got the whole year group and like you really. Think about the game. It is just. It is just sitting in a circle. It's sitting in a circle passing. Something nothing enjoyable about passing something to someone else. Nine out of the 10 times you open the parcel, you don't get anything.

23:58 And every kid knows, they know instinctively that obviously the teacher's going to make sure that like various people like that, it's not just, it's not actually chance, is it? Yeah. They're just the teachers stand there watching and they're pausing it or haven't. That person hasn't had it yet. Pause. It's so rubbish. Have you seen the Bluey episode where Lucky's dad does past the parcel and he has Lucky's dad's? Look up Lucky's dad's rules for past the parcel. It it caused a bit of a friction. I mean, are you going to tell me right now? No, I'm not going to tell you right now what's no, it's basically Lucky's dad thinks it should be paid that traditional way because like the new way is you get a little, you know, a little treat on every time you unwrap it. So you unwrap it traditional. No, that's like the new way where everyone's got to have. Some. Yeah, yeah, you get like a little chocolate coin.

24:39 Yes, you open, it falls out, I've got a little something. It's not the main prize that. You pass it on. Lucky's dad in the in the show, Bluey is like, no, that's just stupid. My, we've got to do the traditional. Why? Because he's Australian, obviously. Yeah, clearly, with which that was clearly that you just did. And his whole point is like, now we just play it. If you open it, you're disappointed, you didn't get anything tough, you wait and you get the main prize at the end. So there's a whole little like and someone in our group chat because we're doing a little party for the kids, my mates and all the kids and we're going to do past the parcel. And someone said we didn't like his dad's rule. And it just like it was like it really divided the group. Wow, what's your thought on that? I just don't care. I don't care. Like if Rory turned out I took him to a party and they were doing either of the rules, I just tell him to just if he was annoyed by one of them, like get over.

25:24 But that's fair enough. But what would you pick though if you would if you're doing the hosting? I do the small prize every time. Yeah, like every time. RIP. I wouldn't do lucky. Because you're wet. Yeah. Because I'm wet. Because I'm a lefty wokey liberal, and I'm ruining the mind of our children, not preparing them for the real world. They're kids. Yeah. Oh, my. If a Yeah Joe, a little chocolate coin can fall. Out if it's supposed to be a fun game Yeah, exactly. I'm going to pick the one that's that's 1% fun rather than 0% fun. Do you know what I mean? It's already a horribly. Boring game. It's not a it's not a metaphor for life when they're older and one person gets something the rest don't. Yeah, it's a game for seven-year olds. Grow up. Yeah, stop getting annoyed at people giving kids and nice things because it's not what you got. Maybe when you were a kid and just lighten up a bit, you freak. That to me or everybody?

26:07 Else it's it's to you if you have this. Thought no. Fair enough. Yeah, gorgeous. Checking for Mr Anonymous. What is your most unhinged behaviour management technique for your class in the run up to Christmas? Sit down you little, and do your work. I'll tell Santa you got nothing. You. Are you all right today? I'm on one. Yeah, you are. I'm just testing out there who can understand what a joke is and what sarcasm is, and there'll be someone out there thinking teachers are next generation. And he says things like this. Yeah, in a room outside of the class, not around the children. You. Of course, it's sarcasm. It's a joke. I'm being. What I really said was you're a little.

26:50 You're getting too comfortable. No, this is a professional podcast. Stop. Pretending like I said something horrendous. OK, you're going to beep. That aren't you just because I bleeped it and put something over your mouth again so no one can possibly lip read? What you're saying you're framing me. You're. Framing me? What did you say then? Christmas. No. No. You'll just beep this, probably again, and just pretend something else came out. Will I? Yeah, you are, honestly. Right. What's your most unhinged technique then? I didn't have any unhinged techniques. I didn't really change my techniques. I'm a person. I just like kept saying like this is my technique, guys. Yeah, come on. Do you want to ruin Christmas for me? Stuff like that. But I don't. I don't.

27:31 I don't think I had. Any I was just trying to show how my completely average paving management continued. Throughout Christmas, I guess I'd. Maybe someone's talking John. My favourite thing in the world is yeah, go on. I said, I think I've said this for on the podcast, but it's my favourite technique because it worked every time was when 10 people are doing low level chatter. You say I'm just waiting for two people. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And my favourite one in the world because they just think that they're being embarrassed. They think, oh crap, it's 2 and I'm talking to someone, it's us too. And all of them stop their micro conversations because they think I'm talking about them just waiting for two extremely rude people. Apart from the group of three that are chatting and go our teachers been a bell end. Don't worry about it. Yeah, nothing. Maths teacher can't care what prick.

28:14 Yeah, so sorry Sir, that's the worst answer we've ever given. Don't really have any unhinged behaviour when from tennis. What do you, what do you, what kind of things do you think is in here? Do you think people do mad things at Christmas like telling the kids if you don't behave, Santa won't come? I reckon it might have. I reckon it absolutely might have. I guess the one thing you do have at Christmas is so much stuff going on that you could just threaten them not to do it. Yeah, right. Then Mr If you want to carry on talking, you won't be going to the school fair for Christmas, you won't be doing the Christmas play at the end of the year. You shall not be going to Santa's Grotto that we changed the ICT suite into and you shall definitely not be doing the colour again. I've got for you the last night. Oh, watching Dennis the minutes on DVD, your treat Christmas edition. There's so much you can like dangle and say you're not going to have.

28:54 Yeah, unless you behave yourself. Yeah. You. Little. I'm not don't you're framing. Do you know what I'm all framing? I'm sat here thinking there's so much editing to do with this podcast because your nose is leaking. It's about we got the 2. It's about time you did something. For is it? Honest to God, yeah. Funny joke that. Hey, then it's Die Hard, a Christmas film from tom-tom. tom-tom. You are barking these out, my mate. He does. It is, though. I mean, it's just. Yeah, it's a simple answer, isn't it? Yes, of course it is a Christmas film. It's Christmas film. Oh, but it doesn't have the magic of Christmas and the two people falling in love under the tree, and it's not very romantic and they don't get to save Christmas all the time. I don't care. What's Christmas without better blood? It's Christmas. You know Christmas.

29:35 Get over it, guys. Come on. Next question. This one's written from two people that read the same question, Jamie and Tom again. What's the most unhinged or crazy gift you've seen during Secret Santa? Right. I'm going to just to package this question and use this as a hook for you to come back on Wednesday because we're going to talk about some Secret Santa stories on our next episode. We'll answer this question then. But some of the stories that we have for Secret Santa are unbelievable. So if you're listening to this, either press follow and put notifications on so you get it on Wednesday first thing. It's going to be hilarious. Or if it is past Wednesday, there's something of December, I don't know. Watch this one. Watch the next episode immediately after this. That's all I'll say for that one. That is clever.

30:18 That is a that is a way to hook people in and get get their retention out getting watching their episodes. So yeah, we'll come back to that one. That's a different question from Haley instead. Then what is the craziest thing that has happened to you in school during the Christmas period? In brackets, Christmas dinner productions, Carol concerts, etc. I had someone in my training year who stole actual money from Christmas fair stand because we just, it's weird on Christmas fair because I've been to schools where they're really strict about you need to go around with your parents. I've also been to schools where it's just like, off you go. Kids go and roam the school and go to all different Christmas fair stands. I made one kid obviously went off and just stole cash from like the pot. This is a good stand. This stands, the money pot stand. I'll just take this money. How much for the money, Sir?

30:59 It's free. Yeah, they had a little year 3 running the money stand. So you're a £10 note for 2P? Yeah, thank you. I'll take that. Based basically just stole. I remember the teachers being fuming and his parents took him to the police station. Yeah, I remember the parents were like, the parents were livid. Obviously you'd be you're horrified, wouldn't you? Yeah, of course. And I know it's just a kid. I know you've got to learn. But like when they're that, they know what they're doing. He knew he was stealing money and he shouldn't. And they took him to the police station and just scared him. And it was hilarious, like, like hearing about how scary he was after. I was like, good. Like every honestly, every now and then you need that if you're going to do something like that. He won't do it again. Yeah, I wonder if he did. Maybe to a career criminal inspired him came back from a police.

31:40 Station with a gun. Stole that one. I was there. He's got a tattoo in his face and like one of the tears. Where have you bids ready? Now I've learned all the inside. Yeah, I've got it. Thanks for that, parents. It changed me my time on the inside of the PlayStation. So that's funny. Yeah, I don't have anything to top that. No, I, I don't actually think that there's much else we can say here rather than we can wrap it up and we can say we've got another Christmas special coming on Wednesday. Why don't you listen? Why don't you come along for the stories? It's going to be a good one. I'm going to. I've edited so much of this part. I'm not editing out. I'm not. I'm not doing.

32:21 That I love how you are saying you edited past tense. Yeah, as if you've already done that. You would do at this point in time. You clearly haven't. No, because. I think about the listeners and the viewers. For them, they would have known this. What can people do? They listened to the episode and remotely enjoyed it. Was it? I don't know how to feel about that episode. It it feels a bit unhinged. Was it a was it a Christmas special? I'm wearing it. What do you mean? Was it a Christmas? Every question was to do with Christmas. What do you want to happen for us to say it's a Christmas? OK, but this is what I mean by this is it was based. If I was summarising this episode, it's you being a Scrooge, burping into the mic, swearing words you've never sworn before on this podcast and chucking your Christmas hat off. Merry Christmas everyone, hope you have an amazing time if you celebrate it and if you don't, I hope you have a great time anyway. Why wouldn't I guys?

33:07 If you enjoyed this episode for some reason, I really hope you did. And whatever platform you're on, this goes out in lots of different places. Do the thing on that platform, which helps with engagement. So like subscribe, like subscribe, follow, comment, share, share and everything, share, share. That's your Christmas to us. Ratings, ratings and shares, guys. Whatever platform you're on, you could do that for us and wish us a very Merry Christmas. You could do and transfer us 500,000. Pounds each. Wow, that's nice. Just one of them, okay. Either Bye. Yeah, see you.