Bitesize #5: School Dinner Desserts, A Finger Dilemma & The Ultimate Friendship Test

0:00 Hello everyone and welcome back to another bite size episode of Teach State Repeat. My name is Dylan and this is Boulder Locks. Hello, Boulder. Locks. Oh, thanks. I thought we were going to do a cool intro and that was your that was your take on it, so. That was my good intro. That's good. Cheers mate. Hey everyone, it's Hayden here, your favourite host. Who? The funny one, not the first thing. I think of when I think of you. Do you know what I found out the other day? Straight in was I was so proud of Boulder locks in the three hairs as a name that I invented. It was on an old advert, apparently. No, it wasn't, yeah, someone said. Someone said at school the other day because I was waiting for you to come out of the church service and I was with a colleague of ours and I said, Oh yeah, just waiting for bold deluxe.

0:46 Then she went, that's like bold deluxe and the three hairs. And I went, wow. And she said yeah, was in an old advert. And I was like, I thought I'd invented it, but I hadn't. I just still in your Thunder, mate. Ignore that. Ignore that. The 80s. Advert was around definitely after I thought of it about six months ago, for sure, anyway. It's nice to see your camera so zoomed in your heads filling the screen. I'll have you know that you constantly moan at my head's too small. And anyway, Hayden, most people don't watch the podcast that I tell you every week. Well, I've told you what I think about those people and I, you know, I'm not gonna say it again. What's that? You don't watch the podcast. Yeah. Hayden doing a sign to you all right now? I don't know. I did. And people. That are just listening. Didn't see it, so whoops.

1:28 Anyway, anyway, what we doing? What we doing? What we doing? This episode Hayden, and in the middle of the last episode that we put out, we did a little bit big games, bit a bit of fun, bit of bit of laughter, a bit of organised fun, because what's better than organised forced fun? Nothing. Which is why you should go back and check out our other Bites Out episodes where we can't speak our other bite size episode. Proper pronunciation, please. Really good about business episode is guys, we never got there either. That's all. Staying in, you know, Do you know? What's good about episodes? Well, I don't know. I don't know what they are so. What's great is they are raw, authentic and unedited. So you get the real eyes, guys. You get the real eyes in these parts of the.

2:09 Script is I couldn't. Say it again. What is going on? Bite size episodes, right? Should. We get the author queue back up because yeah, we are just. Where's my script? You know when we're separate from each other, and I can't stare at your screen where you've got everything right. Now, I mean, I can't stare at me on the screen. You're staring. At yourself constantly still getting to our games. We've got a few different random games here guys, so play along at home. Let us know how you get on and what your opinions would be as well. Hayden kind of kicks off Do I want? To what now do? You want to kick us off? All I heard was, do I want to kick us off? No, I want you to kick me off because I am still thinking of my game by the time you play this. I will be prepared.

3:00 Yeah, basically. Yeah. Yeah. I I knew what I was gonna I'm I'm confident. I just want you to play yours first. You're. You're confident, but I won't do it, Yeah. Yeah, you go, I'm. Gonna start you off, OK? We're gonna do another. Blind rank, because I don't feel like I trapped you enough last time. This time I've prepared another 5 classic school dinner desserts, so I'm gonna give you them one at a time. Of course, as we know. Blind for real? Yeah, for real. Yeah, definitely. So one at a time, I want you to blind rank these classic school dinner desserts, and your first one to place one to five is an Arctic roll. Strong start, I'll tell you that. That's a strong start.

3:44 It's a real strong start. There's anything top on Arctic? Roll. I don't know. Maybe 2. Two. OK, good. Next one Jam Roly Poly. Three straight in No. Message about it Okay, coconut and jam sponge. 55 That's terrible. That's disgusting. I do. Agree. I don't really like coconut at all I've done. The gun there, I'm doing it. That's fine. That's. Fine. Next one. Chocolate sponge with chocolate. Custard. 4. Oh, that. Would be my #5. I should have saved that for #5. Why? Please explain. You're a chocolate theme.

4:24 What's going on? I am. I'm a chocolate fiend. Not I'm just fake rubbish chocolate custard. It tastes nothing like chocolate. Well, it's good to know that you're completely wrong about something else as well. And finally, so you've only got the first lot left, am I? OK. Yeah. Apparently Guys Hayden thinks that the number one best classic primary school dessert is an iced bun. I mean, that's pretty good. It's not the top, it's not the top, but it's not as bad as four or five. So can. We talk about ice buns. We can talk about ice buttons because I know we've both got a. Bit of a yeah. Thing of ice buns, right you. Better be in my bonnet, haven't me. I don't know about. And it's almost with myself because I bloody love them. I bloody love a nice one, but let's just dissect what a nice bun is.

5:09 Would I ever eat 5 bread rolls in a row? No. Hang on. Sorry, there's an immediate problem here. No one eats five of anything, really. In real life, should you be in five in a row anyway? Right there, Ayden, because alas, I would not eat 5 rolls in a row. However, rather than with icing on the top and. The smallest layer as well. It's still like 96% bread. It's not even in the middle. It's not even like in the centre of the role. If you get a wrong bite or a wrong chomping and you miss the icing, you are literally just eating dry bread. You. Know you can get those big ones from like the pack of two from Tesco, like the the sort of meaty sized ones. My mum always used to buy them and I would literally cut off or or just pick off like 80% of the bread, right? So it was basically just a thin layer of bread of icing on both. Stick them together, icing to icing to icing and then eat it like a sandwich.

6:14 And you know, it was great. You had your hot dogs ready for later with the rest of the run. They, yeah. Yeah, exactly that. So I'm exposing myself here. But I tell you what you might be laughing or someone might be thinking. That's disgusting. That's disgraceful. Do it. I promise you, you won't regret it. You'll be like, oh, it's like a nice bun, but actually nice because it's not full of bread. Essentially and it's an iced. Eating an iced sandwich. Yeah, you've basically got an icing sandwich. How mad is that? Why is that a thing? Right. I'm gonna. I'm gonna do a Thingy 5. What's it called? Blind. Great. Start great. Start. This is, I must say, we've really refined our podcasting skills, haven't we at this point. So we got about a year you can.

6:57 Tell We haven't got time to edit, so blind rank for you. And I'm making this one up on the spot, so even better. Good job. It will definitely be terrible then. Chocolates but luckily I'm an expert on chocolates, so it'll be fine. Christmas chocolates. OK, SO5 Christmas chocolates. Yeah. OK. I'm gonna be very specific. I'm not gonna say, like, heroes roses. I'm actually gonna say the specific chocolate. That's good to know. That's all right. OK, starting off Ready Galaxy Caramel 2 from A celebrations. Oh, straight into strong. I really like them, but there are numerous that are actually better. So too, yeah. Fair enough. Fair enough. Normal. Terry's Chocolate Orange.

7:40 Four. And the reason is, it's decent, it's decent, but it's not like I wouldn't choose it. I'd eat it if it was there and I'd enjoy it. And I want to keep 5 free because there's just there's a plethora that I would never put above. This next one will be interesting and and I'm expanding this to more sweets, not just chocolate. OK, so candy canes. Five. Absolutely nonsense because. Some people love them. I wasn't sure. You look like one of those guys that might like candy games. The worst we do with the worst thing in the world is with candy canes. They're not even that nice anyway, but it's when you open up, I'll give it a go, put it in your mouth, Peppermint, get a bin that is not enjoyable. I don't want peppermint, thank you very much. I want some.

8:20 I want some soukra. I want some sugar in my mouth. I don't want. I've already peppermint. I have some chewing gum and I'm like sweet. Yeah, fair play, fair play. All right, next one box of Maltesers. Number one, Maltesers are the ultimate, ultimate snack. And again, I know we talked recently about, you know, teacher gifts and stuff and obviously we're just grateful no matter what we get. But come on Hayden, when you when you see a box of Maltesers, you're just like, I'm eating them in break time. They're not even going home. Yeah, that's fair enough and I agree and I kind of you would say that which was good fun. Last one, as you know it's not pre planned, so I get to have fun here because I know you've left #3 So what do you? Think about. I was going to say bounty, I know. You were, Yeah, Brilliant.

9:05 This game kind of falls apart, mate when you make it up as you go along. I. Know I can just think of the worst one to give you. Yeah, honestly, but thanks. That bounty's in a circle to be honest with you. That is terrible. That's horrendous. Because bounty to me, I wouldn't even. I wouldn't even give it 5th. Honestly, I wouldn't even give it the respect. I might actually just ignore that you said that is there. Anything worse than a Bounty Christmas chocolate wise? Well. Snickers because I'm allergic to nuts. But, but even though I'm allergic, even I'm allergic, I think I'd rather eat Snickers. Really. Wow, I really hate Snickers. Just taste wise. I think Snickers is disgusting, but. I'd still rather that than the mountain. During that time, I tried to give you a Snickers. I was at school and I was like, hey mate, it's a chocolate. Just seeing if you'd eat Snickers. That's a really good banter and well done for perpetuating that thing against people with you know allergies. That's really funny how the models because he's. Making it out, that's why.

9:58 Why is that thing? There's a thing to my mates, though, honestly. They're like, you're lying. I'm like we have to do. Some nuts. No, you're not, mate. Start getting the attention. Honestly. Oh no, I can't. It'll make it'll make my throat swell. Will it? No, it won't. It'll give me a bit of a rash. Okay on right. I'm here representing anyone out there has got allergies. Don't listen to this. Numpty, right? It's a serious thing. Listen, I'm allergic to the thing that I love the most in this. World, What's that? What's your own voice? I. Should say my child right now? Chocolate. What? I'm allergic to chocolate. No, you're not. I'm. A lactose intolerant. Oh man, you can't give me all this nonsense. I honest to God, if I walked in, if there was a camera set up in your house that followed you around and I randomly opened it, there is an 80% chance you've got chocolate in your mouth or in your hand. If you are not allergic to chocolate, that. Sounds like a good new TV show.

10:52 The chocolate Cam. Just 124 hour live stream can you? Imagine your 24 hour live stream. Honestly, you'd be eating chocolate on the toilet or holding your waning child and that would just be it. Was scrolling on TikTok or something? Yeah. What a life. Anyway, you got another game? Yeah. I've got I've got hypothetical question. Okay and I really. Want to I want to know what people think about this. I really don't know the answer either, so I want you to really try and dive deep here. Okay, I'm really thinking about it. So you're offered and you can say no straight away before the next caveat you're offered 10,000 lbs. Brilliant. You're offered 10,000 lbs. To cut off one of your fingers.

11:35 OK, and now the game is. However, for every consecutive finger you chop off after that, the amount of money that I'll give you is multiplied by 10. How many fingers would you chop off? Oh my God, yeah. Because if you were gonna say like, if I had to like there's a no obviously to the first proposal. If it was just that, like 10,000 lbs for a finger. Not worthy, but to get to. A million, £110,000 if you got two and it's 1,110,000. So it accumulates as well, of course. Oh, I don't know. I reckon I'd look good with no fingers.

12:18 With a bionic hand. Yeah, they call me Sir. Thumbs a lot. Just thumbs, no fingers. And how much in the bank. Couple of like Quadrillion I. Don't know, don't be. Quite works like that. So one is 10 grand, two is 100 grand. Let's just say pounds of 10/3 is 1,000,000. Four is 10 million. Like do you need four of your fingers? You have £10 million. Five fingers. Just get rid of a hand. We'll count thumbs as a finger £10 million to get rid of your hand. 100 mil in IT we've done tenant we. I can't count whatever it is, yeah. We're in the billions. 100 grand, 1,000,000 three 10 million, four 100 million five £1 billion if you cut off 6 fingers. I'm taking the trillion.

13:07 Are you going to do all of? It I'm taking the trillion, what do I what do I need? I need two things on each hand and it's and it's. I'm not going to do it. What on earth? What? I'm sorry, what do you think you're going to achieve if you only have two fingers? I've still got the thumbs. I can pick stuff up. Yeah, all. You need to be able to do is type in your pin code, I guess to. Access your money. You've got 1 digit. I don't need one finger, I can do it. No, I can't hold this much cash. In all seriousness, I would say no at the start. I don't want to lose any of my fingers at all. I don't think I'd do it at all. We've not, we've not ten fingers, but. It's not worth it unless you lose at least three fingers, right?

13:48 And even that. Actually, no, that's a lie. It's not worth. It's not worth it really, unless you lose 4 fingers, is it? So you don't think it's worth £1,000,000 for three? Fingers. No, not really. If you think about £1,000,000 in today AS. Well, I am thinking. It's like okay that will buy me a really nice house. Yeah, and. That's it. And then it's gone. It's got you've got the rest of your life to continue making money and maintaining that, but. You have got a really nice house though. True, but I also don't have a couple of few fingers now. Isn't it weird? Like it becomes more appealing to me the more fingers I lose. Yeah, of course, yeah. It's like, I guess, I guess I'd much rather in this situation lose 6 fingers than one, yeah. That's what I mean.

14:28 So it's like it's so the question really is would you lose 6 or 7 fingers to be like criminally rich forever or just have just have your hands but the other? Thing you got to think about is charity and stuff like how much are your fingers worth when you can solve world hunger. I mean true. That's true because if like if you went for if thumbs were included right And you did all 10. Yeah, that's like solving crisis level. Yeah, that kind of money, you know? Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah. But I want my fingers where we can solve everything we can. We can investigate all of the horrible diseases we can wipe out. There be no child ever hungry again. I want to hold my controller play. Games, we will literally spend the billion of that, because a billion will be nothing compared to like the quintillion or whatever you'll be on at that point.

15:10 So we'll spend a billion at that. We'll make a company and we'll get the best bionic hand you've ever seen. Yeah. Exactly. They'll be. They'll be, They'll be. Epic they'll be to get a quintillion, but anyway. Yeah, surely. Because what are we on? We want 100 million by. We want a billion at six trillion at seven. No, no. No, no, no, not. A trillion 10 bit I've got. 47 fingers? Why don't you have 40 I forgot about? The 1000, yeah, 10 billion, 700 billion. Yeah, trillion trillion 10. Trillion not far off. 10 trillion. 10 trillion. Yeah, 10 trillion. That was that was my question. So, final answer right now, how many fingers are you chopping? Off 10. Oh, that's it. I've you've convinced me now 5-10 trillion. I'll not only give myself bionic hands, I'll solve the world's problems.

15:53 Yeah. You're an idiot, mate. I'm not chopping off any what no, I think. I just take 5 trillion. Between us, we cut off 10 and they're all yours. It's brilliant. Well, I'm gonna finish this episode with a little game as well, because I wanna know. I mean, you've kind of just proved that they're not very good friend, but I want to know how much of A friend you are. OK, a bit of a friend test. So I'm gonna ask you some questions. If you get any wrong, you lose. And I don't like losing game shows, so. OK, don't normally lose them, but. Let's see how much of A friend you are, shall we? Yeah, I've lost more than I've won, so that's completely. Fingers or okay? That's a weird game show. Yeah.

16:34 Anyway. Right, question number one, Dylan, to see if you are a real friend or not. What is my most desired pet? A dog 100% and I go further than this. It is some kind of like Labrador golden retriever type dog. Which one is overly friendly? Golden retriever I think overly friendly overly. You know, you're the kind of person who craves attention and affirmation, so you want the kind of dog in your. Life. Yeah, Hence this game. So thank you. Yeah, this is the golden retriever equivalent of a game I. Want to find out if you're my golden retriever? Next question When's my birthday? When's your birthday? Oh God, wait a minute.

17:16 Your birthday is in July. Yeah, because it's at the end of the school year. Yeah. Oh no, it's the 23rd of July 20. 3rd of July is correct. Yeah, it's good. I always get bothered up because Laurence birthday is the end of July and I always like, Oh my God, you're both like, I don't know. What year, though, was I born? Oh. You're dead old 1992 nineteen. 92 All right, fair play. I thought you might have failed at the 2nd. Hurdle there? No, I nearly did because I'm so bad at birthdays. Anyone who knows me understands that, Yeah. Fair play, fair play. Yours, luckily was on our like part of our business tax return.

17:57 So I just learned it from years ago from from doing that. So favourite type of alcohol. What's my I'm not that I drink much, but if I'm going to drink, what's it? What's it going to be? Gin. Absolutely. With what? Yeah. Lemonade Not, not Tonic Gym with lemonade. It seems very good. I'm quite proud here. I'm impressed. I feel good. Yeah. Can I give you a little pet? You probably would. You're so hairy, right? This one. You're not going to get this one. And if you do, I will actually be, like, properly impressed. Ready. What is my favourite film? Your favourite film. Some crap ending stuff from your film degree. Your favourite film.

18:44 Give me give me an error. Give me an error. Come on, I'll. Give the year, is it? Is it in the 90s? No 2014, 2000 and. 14 your favourite films, Interstellar? Interstellar, yeah, yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah, I knew that. I should have got that straight away because the soundtracks are unreal. I remember you. Yeah. Wow, Very good. Okay. Last question. There's five for five, which I didn't really plan on getting this far because I thought you'd fail way earlier. Yep, last question, what's my most beautiful feature? If that's your real last question, I'm not answering it. But you find most attractive.

19:25 Is there a right or wrong answer to this? That's why. That's why now. You are most beautiful feature to me. Yeah. Is the weird bit of metal behind your front 2 teeth. That's the correct answer. What is it? You're 31. What is that doing there? I'm not going to show people on this. I'll be more embarrassing than opening your mouth. And so I've got a bit of metal. My 2 front teeth. Hold them together because I want a gappy Gabby boy when I was young.

20:07 Has. It not been solved, yeah. I had braces and then afterwards they put this in. They were like, keep that there for two years to stop them just ping it apart Then it's been 15 years. It's still there. Good old Is it meant to fall out? Get old 2 feet. It's. Not. Meant to fall out, but they said like it probably will eventually. The real question is, was it an actual choice you made, or was it just the fact that you no longer have an NHS dentist and can never get one because it's completely ruined? Let's not talk dentists, Let's not talk dentist. It'll roll you right up.

20:50 So. What do I get for winning? Because all you said was if I get one wrong, I lose. But I got all of them right. So what's? You are gonna win the number one on your blind rank, which is a box of Maltesers. Bang. You need to actually get one of them because I put on Instagram. Yeah, I will. That's that's the price. I've got it downstairs waiting for you is. It half eaten because it won't reach me if you got it downstairs now. It will not reach me if it's not been open to the invite. Disclaimer, I don't have it downstairs, but I will buy him one. Well done. I'm actually quite impressed. You are now my little golden retriever. Thank you. You're. Welcome. You're welcome. You're welcome. I thought you were a terrible friend, but it turns out you're not. Maybe I'll do something similar to you next time, maybe I won't because I don't need it. Don't need it from you. it from you. it from you. it from you. it from you.

21:39 I I I I was was was was going. going. going. going. To To To To say say say say it it it it was, was, was, was, you you you you know, know, know, know, we're we're we're we're going going going going to to to to tag tag tag tag this this this this of of of of education, education, education, education, it it it it feels feels feels feels a a a a bit bit bit bit of of of of like like like like a a a a misleading misleading misleading misleading it's. it's. it's. it's. Ohh, Ohh, Ohh, they they they don't don't don't care care care about about about us us us at at at all. all. all. OK. OK. OK. Interview Interview with with Rishi. Rishi. Sunak Sunak on on the the future future of of education education What's What's my my favourite favourite feature? feature? Go dinners.

22:23 Oh, right, we're gonna wrap it.